Friday, January 19, 2007

 

Oh Leroy, I Wish I Knew How to Quit You

A warm cup of nostalgia is always sure to cure what ales ya, hence the appearance of a new post on Pulling A Blyleven. The Hot Stove has been decidedly frosty for the Twins thus far this off-season, prompting CNN.SI's John Heyman to generously grade Minnesota's little team that could a "D" for their winter transaction activity. Well--and speaking of nostalgia--that was before the news of Matt Lecroy inking a minor league deal surfaced. And we know how it happened too--Leroy, bamboozled by the open bar at Cuddy's wedding, stole Cuddles' cell phone and drunk dialed Terry Ryan in a mojito-induced haze. "You know Terry...if you don't mind me saying so...I think I forgot my throwin' arm in the Homer Dome's storage room next to the leftover Cristian Guzman bobbleheads...uh....what's that? Oh the belly..yeah, I didn't forget that." While Matty is a longshot to make the squad, perhaps he can be sent down to the Red Wings in time to defend his eating records at area Rochester eateries.

In other, perhaps more baseball-related news, the Twins reached an agreement with Ramon Ortiz. While the Twins need another +5.00 ERA like I need a pulmonary embolism, his scanty 3 million dollar contract sure looks nice compared to Ted Lilly et al. Together with Gordito and Gordito #2 (Ponson), the Twins can have a good ol' fashioned "recapture the magic" theme during Spring Training. Then again, that theme, which I believe was the theme to my junior prom, will not likely end up being the theme of my senior prom, "A Walk to Remember"*. What is certain is that all of the above will soon be stored away in the "traumatic rites of passage" (thanks to Jim H. for the correction--I'm a proud student of the University of Duh)folder in my cerebrum.

Finally, news also breaks that Kiko Liriano is slating an October return to the mound. Now, the last time a pitcher rushed back from Thomas John surgery in an attempt to pitch in October, we got Joe Mays. But maybe this will work out for the best as we'll maybe be in playoff contention and...this seems probable...needing a reliable starter. But this is starting to sound an awful lot like last season. Then again, maybe the starting pitching can be 2007's middle infield--a pre-season question mark, initially answered with aging fatsos, that sooner or later became a strength once younger players are inserted in the line-up.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

*Any reference to Mandy Moore is purely coincidental and absolutely a freudian slip.

---WV

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