Tuesday, May 12, 2009
We're Almost There
PREGAME:
Well, almost there in both terms of the academic year and the standings. The Twins are close, and I have but to refine a paper for a conference on Thursday. Then! Back to baseball, back to blogging, and hopefully gainful summer employment.
It's been a long time. Let's see if I still remember how to do this. Just so you know, when I was in B'more, I took a lot of pictures during warmups. Pictures of booty. I'll share them with you eventually, but I want to get you a little worked up first, y'know?
TOP 1ST
RK: I believe in Slowey gin fizz. He's supposed to be the next Bradke there then
DK: I have full faith that "Slow Ride" will "take it easy" this evenin
RK: Wow that girl was yawning HARD. Like, aren't you excited to be at the Metrodome in its FINAL SEASON?
KK: She's all "I'm le tired...and thought it was wednesday for dollar dome dogs, le whine."
RK: What are the Tuesday Metrodome promos?
KK: I think half price home run porch? And "I wish it was Wednesday days"
RK: If I knew a guy named Greg Anderson, I'd call him Granderson. Not Curtis
DK: Slowey with a 3-ball count, I may faint
KK: If the game was outside, it would be in a rain delay. Sometimes I will miss the dome just for that reason and uh, thats about it.
DK: 4 pitch walk from Slowey *faints*
KK: Slowey please don't suck right away, I mean at least build me up then crush my hopes and dreams. better yet let the bullpen do that.
DK: QTF, ump, oh, never mind. It's Ed Rapuano. His strike zone is the size of a postage stamp, and worth far less than $0.43
KK: Sometimes I wish Kevin Slowey was a ground out pitcher not a fly out. Less of a stress factor.
DK: I wonder if Clete Thomas' nickname is "Spike"
KK: Clete, cleats, spike, ouch, pain, blood, zombie.
DK: I see no holes in that reasoning
KK: Clete Thomas is a zombie.
RK: That sounds like something a zombie would say...
DK: There's your ground ball KK
KK: ......DOUBLE PLAY! I can haz? Oh why thank you SO MUCH.
DK: And up steps the douchebag. A scary, but productive inning
BOTTOM 1ST, AT LEAST FOR ME, MY GAME IS DELAYED SO IT'S PROBABLY THE 5TH INNING AND IT MAKES FOR ANACHRONISTIC LIVEBLOGGING. SO.
RK: Guys, let's hope this game ends before 5:00 am EDT. Blogger's gonna have a scheduled outage
DK: Pfft...let's play 83!
RK: I won't rest till Punto pitches an inning. And does a headfirst slide off the mound to finish his delivery
RK: I'd like to see the Ford defense graphics try to not be so future-y. Like y'know ,a sepia tone and a harpsichord playing in the background. And a hyphen in "Short-stop"
KK: I have a theory as to why Manny was taking those women fertility drugs, it isn't actually from a pill. Clete is a zombie, matt tolberts walk on song is "zombie" by the cranberries, Clete bit Magglio Whoredonez because he's an 80's porn star, then he went on and bit Manny. Did I mention Magglio is actually a woman? And when he bit Manny he got injected with PMS, Post Magglio Suckage.
DK: Zombie thievery!
KK: ZOMBIES STEAL HOME RUNS, along with brains and blood.
DK: OMG shall have his revenge. Mark my words
DK: RK, they should do that whilst they wear their super sexy throwback jerseys.
RK: I hope Dlmn was taking notes on how to track a ball that's in the air
DK: TB and I have dubbed Dlmn "Roomba," as he goes around in circles yet still manages to suck in everything
RK: Let it be done!
TOP 2ND
RK: OH MY LORD AND SAVIOR, SIR SYDNEY POITIER, I MAY BE IN TOWN FOR AN ALL YOU CAN EAT SEAT
DK: Leaving the bag early takes its toll, Bert!
KK: Whenever I see Magglio I sing "let your soul gloooooow!"
KK: Oh, that double play was most good, but.....or...what? Okay if he isn't touching the base and he tried to run to second I think that he should be out.
DK: I guess he tagged up
RK: Well the right call's the right call
KK: wild pitch? whats next, a home run? RK, I know it is but in my mind it isn't. Just like how every single game I find a reason why it's Cuddyers fault
RK: Yeah, you'll change your mind when you see the pictures from Cuddy's pornographic stretching routine
KK: Can I say I can have sexual feelings for someone, and want to see said pornographic stretching photographs and also hate said person at the same time?
DK: I don't think that's possible, either you want him or you hate him, KK
KK: Don't make me choose! I can't! It's not fair!
RK: Actually that makes sense. To all my ex-girlfriends
DK: Ah but see that's after they got to know you
KK: I want him........not to suck. And lately he 's been a very good boy.
BOTTOM 2ND
KK: I just want to throw this out here, since they are showing Joe Mauer now. I might be getting a new kitten and I am temped to name it "meower". Cute or CUTEST cat name ever?
TB: I see what you did there. I like it. Find one with sideburns
KK: Or I can name it Cuddyer and kick it and say it fails me. I'm kidding. I don't even know where this sudden hate for Cuddyer. And would it be animal abuse if I make the cat have sideburns
RK: Yeah, you're not making any friends with Cuddy Buddies
DK: giving it sideburns would be abuse, but kicking it is ok?
RK: LOGIC
KK: But see I'd never name my cat Cuddyer so there will be no kitty kicking.
DK: I'm full of logic today RK, seeing as I just watched 2+ hours of Zach Quinto getting his Vulcan on
TB: Well well well. CCR is back. Nice to see we won't have another weekend of BBuscher fielding groundballs...
RK: "Are YOU a facebook fan of Fox Sports North yet?" Did I catch a slightly accusatory tone in Dick's voice?
DK: I believe you did. In fact, I felt guilt
TB: Ball go bye bye
DK: BOOM
KK: CREDE HOME RUNS ARE WAY BETTER THAN REGULAR HOME RUNS.
DK: doesn't quite have the same effect when Roomba does it
KK: He is a gorgeous man. A beatiful man. Roomba just ruined my star trek/crede happy high.
TB: Methinks he needs to return to the docking station
KK: Nicholas Paul Punto... sigh.
TOP 3RD, TWINS UP 2-0
DK: Bert Blyleven. Better than YOUR color commentator. FACT.
TB: Slowey doesn't know what to do with the minimized strike zone. I can see it now: "Today, I pitched with an umpire that never called outside corner or inside corner. I'm a guy who paints corners. FML"
DK: I agree, his life is f'd
KK: That would totally be his twitter for the day. Wait is it under 140 characters?
DK: while Tiger fans would tell him "You deserved it"
TB: Joe Nathan memorized that. No joke. He was just looking off to the side because he's camera-shy.
DK: hey now...it's a few more words than "Got you with the slider"
KK: Joe Nathan is so awkward
TB: The Motor City Kitties will be taking over the LOB crown soon
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
KK: Who wears a hawaiian shirt to twins games? Oh douchebags do.
TB: I conclude that Crede is substantiated as H < 270
DK: I think Tolbert just exceeded Sandcastle's sac bunt total
KK: Tolbert needs to teach the whole team how to bunt. Bunt master.
TB: Starting with Pinko
KK: OMG, REVENGE. HAVE IT.
DK: REVENGE SHALL BE MINE!!
KK: JOE MAUER, ZOMBIE KILLER.
DK: I tried pitching inside to Joe Mauer once. It did not go well
KK: Did you know that one weakness for zombies is home runs by studly minnesotan boys? Weird huh?
TB: If anybody has experience about watching homeruns go out, it's Bert
RK: I'll have to readjust my zombie survival kit to one (1) Joe Mauer
DK: and one (1) outside belt-high fastball
RK: "Straight up old school baseball at its finest," huh Coom? I mean, I always thought baseball was more straight up old school baseball but perhaps in the 1870s it was a game of gentlemen manager-players waxing each others' moustachios and waxing philosophic
TOP 4TH, BAILOUT BOMBERS 0 YOUR MNTWINS 4
TB: Definitely slow riding and taking it easy.
RK: That song will forever and ever remind me of the film Dazed and Confused
TB: Tolbert you ass
KK: Matt Tolbert, NEVER TAKE A BALL FROM NICK PUNTO
RK: You know what would be awesome? An out. Or 2
TB: Slow Ride you goofball. Why can't you just have four normal shutout innings
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
TB: For some reason I keep forgetting that we get to bat too. I just like watching Slowey make baserunners magically disappear
DK: its pure voodoo trickery, I tell you. it's like the Dome basepaths are a singularity
TOP 5TH SAME
TB: And now, Brendan Harris in-dugout-because-of-mancrush-on-Punto correspondent
DK: Brendan Harris sounds like he's 14
DK: I can totally imagine Bert setting shoes on fire
TB: Oh I bet they just love doing that.
DK: Double plays are mad hot
TB: Well, um. Matt Tolbert web gem? I did not expect that
RK: Redemption!
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
RK: Dontrelle Willis is going tomorrow?
TB: Affirmative.
RK: I suppose that's good news. For the fightin' geminis
KK: Kevin Slowey gives me heart palpitations. And wow I make a good chicken philly.
DK: what happened? I blinked and we're not batting anymore
TOP 6TH, SAME
KK: So I used string cheese, not provalone for my philly since I have no provalone. And it's kind of amazing. Okay I'm done bragging about my cooking skills. I shouldn't talk, should I RK?
KK: I dont like home runs when our team doesn't hit them, simply put.
TB: Teh shutout iz gon
RK: I'm just happy when people cook for themselves in any capacity. It's not hard and it's cheaper and better for the Earth the end. Off the soapbox
TB: You have inspired me, I may go warm up my EasyMac now.
DK: Remember to use water, TB
RK: Close enough. Gotta eat what you got, right? Your mom would be happy you're cleaning your plate
KK: Awwww RK, being all cute about the earth and stuff. Plus Morneau eats mac and cheese so it's a super awesome food.
TB: Today's Tuesday. If they've only been down University twice I would be very surprised
RK: It's on my mind, I just finished my Political Economy of Digestion seminar paper today
KK: You are so full of fancy sass.
TB: Also, whatever I don't eat will be thrown into my car to take home and then sit in my cupboard at home forever
RK: I feel like we're off topic. Weird.
BOTTOM 6, 4-1 TWINS
TB: Tie goes to the runner
TB: Roomba: Steady diet of sliders and can't digest any of them.
TB: Dick is helping along our food theme tonight, I see
KK: Oh, DLMN YNG HT Hm rn
TB: I'll take that
KK: Double plays, you're doin' it wrong
KK: I just laughed at how Dick said gallaraaagaa's name.
KK: I enjoy Joe Credes slicked back hair. It's so like early 90s beach model.
DK: oh god....they're warming up the wrecking Crain
RK: Span the Bran Muffin better bring in at least 2 here
KK: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DK: oh sure NOW he calls one off the corner
TOP 7TH, TWINS UP 4
TB: We need to create an account called Allowance for Doubtful Insurance Runs. And fill it up with a big number when Crain comes in.
DK: we lack the grades to back up the Accounting jokes, TB 
RK: Made perfect sense to me, but uh, I'm brilliant. ... and modest
TB: Have I ever fallen off a bicycle, Dick? I'm from Oronoco, you fall off your bike and consider it a good day. Fall out of a tree or off the roof and then come ask me about bikes
KK: Joe Mauer is the Mildred of baseball.
TB: I...FOUR DOLLARS?!
DK: let's get Denarded in here
(These rough beasts started talking about Nick Punto's ass, and I've been a bit busy, so just, y'know, imagine that)
BOTTOM 7TH, 5-2 TWINS
KK: I am glad they just showed a couple making out, furthering the reason why I think bert is a dirty old man who eats goldfish, crickets, and night crawlers.
RK: The latter is true separately
TOP 8TH, SAME, YES? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE
TB: That guy in the pepsi commercial sounds like the chocolate rain guy
KK: We do live in America, I wouldn't doubt it for a second that it's actually him.
RK: He has a name. His name is Robert Paulson. I mean Tay Zonday
TB: Yeah, if Mag didn't go on that pitch, I don't know what to think
KK: Jose Mijares' eyes creep me out. Soul sucking, they are.
KK: Matty G does work, son
TB: Well, good.
BOTTOM 8TH, THE BULLPEN HAS BRIDGED THE GAP. COURAGE
TB: Iceman is silly
RK: I like how he needles Bert. I don't think Bert wants absurdity competition
KK: Iceman is most good.
RK: Doubleplusgood
TB: Time for super awesome home run
KK: Iceman is challenging Berts sass....and what did gomez do get shot with an invisible paint ball?
(Stuff is happening and a run scored, but the final paper for the class I teach is due tomorrow, so I'm being innundated with emails, so chill)
TOP 9TH, TWINS UP 4
KK: Tweak is such a spazz ass. I'm shocked he hasn't had a stroke yet from all the stress he puts on himself.
RK: So I'm sure the game is over by now, but I'm still on the second batter. Somebody from the future?
KK: Nathan got spiked OH NOES, that was some fancy dance moves he just did. He was so two stepping.
RK: He's just gonna rub some dirt on it
POSTGAME
Well I did a terrible job transcribing this liveblog. My apologies to DK, KK, TB, and all other two letter combinations and permutations. But! A win!
Well, almost there in both terms of the academic year and the standings. The Twins are close, and I have but to refine a paper for a conference on Thursday. Then! Back to baseball, back to blogging, and hopefully gainful summer employment.
It's been a long time. Let's see if I still remember how to do this. Just so you know, when I was in B'more, I took a lot of pictures during warmups. Pictures of booty. I'll share them with you eventually, but I want to get you a little worked up first, y'know?
TOP 1ST
RK: I believe in Slowey gin fizz. He's supposed to be the next Bradke there then
DK: I have full faith that "Slow Ride" will "take it easy" this evenin
RK: Wow that girl was yawning HARD. Like, aren't you excited to be at the Metrodome in its FINAL SEASON?
KK: She's all "I'm le tired...and thought it was wednesday for dollar dome dogs, le whine."
RK: What are the Tuesday Metrodome promos?
KK: I think half price home run porch? And "I wish it was Wednesday days"
RK: If I knew a guy named Greg Anderson, I'd call him Granderson. Not Curtis
DK: Slowey with a 3-ball count, I may faint
KK: If the game was outside, it would be in a rain delay. Sometimes I will miss the dome just for that reason and uh, thats about it.
DK: 4 pitch walk from Slowey *faints*
KK: Slowey please don't suck right away, I mean at least build me up then crush my hopes and dreams. better yet let the bullpen do that.
DK: QTF, ump, oh, never mind. It's Ed Rapuano. His strike zone is the size of a postage stamp, and worth far less than $0.43
KK: Sometimes I wish Kevin Slowey was a ground out pitcher not a fly out. Less of a stress factor.
DK: I wonder if Clete Thomas' nickname is "Spike"
KK: Clete, cleats, spike, ouch, pain, blood, zombie.
DK: I see no holes in that reasoning
KK: Clete Thomas is a zombie.
RK: That sounds like something a zombie would say...
DK: There's your ground ball KK
KK: ......DOUBLE PLAY! I can haz? Oh why thank you SO MUCH.
DK: And up steps the douchebag. A scary, but productive inning
BOTTOM 1ST, AT LEAST FOR ME, MY GAME IS DELAYED SO IT'S PROBABLY THE 5TH INNING AND IT MAKES FOR ANACHRONISTIC LIVEBLOGGING. SO.
RK: Guys, let's hope this game ends before 5:00 am EDT. Blogger's gonna have a scheduled outage
DK: Pfft...let's play 83!
RK: I won't rest till Punto pitches an inning. And does a headfirst slide off the mound to finish his delivery
RK: I'd like to see the Ford defense graphics try to not be so future-y. Like y'know ,a sepia tone and a harpsichord playing in the background. And a hyphen in "Short-stop"
KK: I have a theory as to why Manny was taking those women fertility drugs, it isn't actually from a pill. Clete is a zombie, matt tolberts walk on song is "zombie" by the cranberries, Clete bit Magglio Whoredonez because he's an 80's porn star, then he went on and bit Manny. Did I mention Magglio is actually a woman? And when he bit Manny he got injected with PMS, Post Magglio Suckage.
DK: Zombie thievery!
KK: ZOMBIES STEAL HOME RUNS, along with brains and blood.
DK: OMG shall have his revenge. Mark my words
DK: RK, they should do that whilst they wear their super sexy throwback jerseys.
RK: I hope Dlmn was taking notes on how to track a ball that's in the air
DK: TB and I have dubbed Dlmn "Roomba," as he goes around in circles yet still manages to suck in everything
RK: Let it be done!
TOP 2ND
RK: OH MY LORD AND SAVIOR, SIR SYDNEY POITIER, I MAY BE IN TOWN FOR AN ALL YOU CAN EAT SEAT
DK: Leaving the bag early takes its toll, Bert!
KK: Whenever I see Magglio I sing "let your soul gloooooow!"
KK: Oh, that double play was most good, but.....or...what? Okay if he isn't touching the base and he tried to run to second I think that he should be out.
DK: I guess he tagged up
RK: Well the right call's the right call
KK: wild pitch? whats next, a home run? RK, I know it is but in my mind it isn't. Just like how every single game I find a reason why it's Cuddyers fault
RK: Yeah, you'll change your mind when you see the pictures from Cuddy's pornographic stretching routine
KK: Can I say I can have sexual feelings for someone, and want to see said pornographic stretching photographs and also hate said person at the same time?
DK: I don't think that's possible, either you want him or you hate him, KK
KK: Don't make me choose! I can't! It's not fair!
RK: Actually that makes sense. To all my ex-girlfriends
DK: Ah but see that's after they got to know you
KK: I want him........not to suck. And lately he 's been a very good boy.
BOTTOM 2ND
KK: I just want to throw this out here, since they are showing Joe Mauer now. I might be getting a new kitten and I am temped to name it "meower". Cute or CUTEST cat name ever?
TB: I see what you did there. I like it. Find one with sideburns
KK: Or I can name it Cuddyer and kick it and say it fails me. I'm kidding. I don't even know where this sudden hate for Cuddyer. And would it be animal abuse if I make the cat have sideburns
RK: Yeah, you're not making any friends with Cuddy Buddies
DK: giving it sideburns would be abuse, but kicking it is ok?
RK: LOGIC
KK: But see I'd never name my cat Cuddyer so there will be no kitty kicking.
DK: I'm full of logic today RK, seeing as I just watched 2+ hours of Zach Quinto getting his Vulcan on
TB: Well well well. CCR is back. Nice to see we won't have another weekend of BBuscher fielding groundballs...
RK: "Are YOU a facebook fan of Fox Sports North yet?" Did I catch a slightly accusatory tone in Dick's voice?
DK: I believe you did. In fact, I felt guilt
TB: Ball go bye bye
DK: BOOM
KK: CREDE HOME RUNS ARE WAY BETTER THAN REGULAR HOME RUNS.
DK: doesn't quite have the same effect when Roomba does it
KK: He is a gorgeous man. A beatiful man. Roomba just ruined my star trek/crede happy high.
TB: Methinks he needs to return to the docking station
KK: Nicholas Paul Punto... sigh.
TOP 3RD, TWINS UP 2-0
DK: Bert Blyleven. Better than YOUR color commentator. FACT.
TB: Slowey doesn't know what to do with the minimized strike zone. I can see it now: "Today, I pitched with an umpire that never called outside corner or inside corner. I'm a guy who paints corners. FML"
DK: I agree, his life is f'd
KK: That would totally be his twitter for the day. Wait is it under 140 characters?
DK: while Tiger fans would tell him "You deserved it"
TB: Joe Nathan memorized that. No joke. He was just looking off to the side because he's camera-shy.
DK: hey now...it's a few more words than "Got you with the slider"
KK: Joe Nathan is so awkward
TB: The Motor City Kitties will be taking over the LOB crown soon
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
KK: Who wears a hawaiian shirt to twins games? Oh douchebags do.
TB: I conclude that Crede is substantiated as H < 270
DK: I think Tolbert just exceeded Sandcastle's sac bunt total
KK: Tolbert needs to teach the whole team how to bunt. Bunt master.
TB: Starting with Pinko
KK: OMG, REVENGE. HAVE IT.
DK: REVENGE SHALL BE MINE!!
KK: JOE MAUER, ZOMBIE KILLER.
DK: I tried pitching inside to Joe Mauer once. It did not go well
KK: Did you know that one weakness for zombies is home runs by studly minnesotan boys? Weird huh?
TB: If anybody has experience about watching homeruns go out, it's Bert
RK: I'll have to readjust my zombie survival kit to one (1) Joe Mauer
DK: and one (1) outside belt-high fastball
RK: "Straight up old school baseball at its finest," huh Coom? I mean, I always thought baseball was more straight up old school baseball but perhaps in the 1870s it was a game of gentlemen manager-players waxing each others' moustachios and waxing philosophic
TOP 4TH, BAILOUT BOMBERS 0 YOUR MNTWINS 4
TB: Definitely slow riding and taking it easy.
RK: That song will forever and ever remind me of the film Dazed and Confused
TB: Tolbert you ass
KK: Matt Tolbert, NEVER TAKE A BALL FROM NICK PUNTO
RK: You know what would be awesome? An out. Or 2
TB: Slow Ride you goofball. Why can't you just have four normal shutout innings
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
TB: For some reason I keep forgetting that we get to bat too. I just like watching Slowey make baserunners magically disappear
DK: its pure voodoo trickery, I tell you. it's like the Dome basepaths are a singularity
TOP 5TH SAME
TB: And now, Brendan Harris in-dugout-because-of-mancrush-on-Punto correspondent
DK: Brendan Harris sounds like he's 14
DK: I can totally imagine Bert setting shoes on fire
TB: Oh I bet they just love doing that.
DK: Double plays are mad hot
TB: Well, um. Matt Tolbert web gem? I did not expect that
RK: Redemption!
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
RK: Dontrelle Willis is going tomorrow?
TB: Affirmative.
RK: I suppose that's good news. For the fightin' geminis
KK: Kevin Slowey gives me heart palpitations. And wow I make a good chicken philly.
DK: what happened? I blinked and we're not batting anymore
TOP 6TH, SAME
KK: So I used string cheese, not provalone for my philly since I have no provalone. And it's kind of amazing. Okay I'm done bragging about my cooking skills. I shouldn't talk, should I RK?
KK: I dont like home runs when our team doesn't hit them, simply put.
TB: Teh shutout iz gon
RK: I'm just happy when people cook for themselves in any capacity. It's not hard and it's cheaper and better for the Earth the end. Off the soapbox
TB: You have inspired me, I may go warm up my EasyMac now.
DK: Remember to use water, TB
RK: Close enough. Gotta eat what you got, right? Your mom would be happy you're cleaning your plate
KK: Awwww RK, being all cute about the earth and stuff. Plus Morneau eats mac and cheese so it's a super awesome food.
TB: Today's Tuesday. If they've only been down University twice I would be very surprised
RK: It's on my mind, I just finished my Political Economy of Digestion seminar paper today
KK: You are so full of fancy sass.
TB: Also, whatever I don't eat will be thrown into my car to take home and then sit in my cupboard at home forever
RK: I feel like we're off topic. Weird.
BOTTOM 6, 4-1 TWINS
TB: Tie goes to the runner
TB: Roomba: Steady diet of sliders and can't digest any of them.
TB: Dick is helping along our food theme tonight, I see
KK: Oh, DLMN YNG HT Hm rn
TB: I'll take that
KK: Double plays, you're doin' it wrong
KK: I just laughed at how Dick said gallaraaagaa's name.
KK: I enjoy Joe Credes slicked back hair. It's so like early 90s beach model.
DK: oh god....they're warming up the wrecking Crain
RK: Span the Bran Muffin better bring in at least 2 here
KK: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
DK: oh sure NOW he calls one off the corner
TOP 7TH, TWINS UP 4
TB: We need to create an account called Allowance for Doubtful Insurance Runs. And fill it up with a big number when Crain comes in.
DK: we lack the grades to back up the Accounting jokes, TB 
RK: Made perfect sense to me, but uh, I'm brilliant. ... and modest
TB: Have I ever fallen off a bicycle, Dick? I'm from Oronoco, you fall off your bike and consider it a good day. Fall out of a tree or off the roof and then come ask me about bikes
KK: Joe Mauer is the Mildred of baseball.
TB: I...FOUR DOLLARS?!
DK: let's get Denarded in here
(These rough beasts started talking about Nick Punto's ass, and I've been a bit busy, so just, y'know, imagine that)
BOTTOM 7TH, 5-2 TWINS
KK: I am glad they just showed a couple making out, furthering the reason why I think bert is a dirty old man who eats goldfish, crickets, and night crawlers.
RK: The latter is true separately
TOP 8TH, SAME, YES? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE
TB: That guy in the pepsi commercial sounds like the chocolate rain guy
KK: We do live in America, I wouldn't doubt it for a second that it's actually him.
RK: He has a name. His name is Robert Paulson. I mean Tay Zonday
TB: Yeah, if Mag didn't go on that pitch, I don't know what to think
KK: Jose Mijares' eyes creep me out. Soul sucking, they are.
KK: Matty G does work, son
TB: Well, good.
BOTTOM 8TH, THE BULLPEN HAS BRIDGED THE GAP. COURAGE
TB: Iceman is silly
RK: I like how he needles Bert. I don't think Bert wants absurdity competition
KK: Iceman is most good.
RK: Doubleplusgood
TB: Time for super awesome home run
KK: Iceman is challenging Berts sass....and what did gomez do get shot with an invisible paint ball?
(Stuff is happening and a run scored, but the final paper for the class I teach is due tomorrow, so I'm being innundated with emails, so chill)
TOP 9TH, TWINS UP 4
KK: Tweak is such a spazz ass. I'm shocked he hasn't had a stroke yet from all the stress he puts on himself.
RK: So I'm sure the game is over by now, but I'm still on the second batter. Somebody from the future?
KK: Nathan got spiked OH NOES, that was some fancy dance moves he just did. He was so two stepping.
RK: He's just gonna rub some dirt on it
POSTGAME
Well I did a terrible job transcribing this liveblog. My apologies to DK, KK, TB, and all other two letter combinations and permutations. But! A win!
# posted by RK @ 7:55 PM 
