Thursday, May 29, 2008
Meat Sweats and Other Food Comas
PREGAME
I'm kicking myself for giving up on last night's game - I should learn to be more hardcore. But also the Twins should remember that I'm a quarter of a century old, and staying up past midnight too many consecutive days makes me put on my crankypants and tell kids to get off of my lawn. And I don't have a lawn.
Tonight's danger - I made blue cheese cheeseburgers. You know the kind that you put the cheese crumbles between two patties and melt some on top? Oh yeah, that. Best one of those I ever had was at the St. Clair(e?) Broiler. Man, I love that place. I could talk about food all night, and I would, save for the fact that this here is a baseball blog and I shouldn't be so stupid.
Tonight we have Slowey Gin Fizz up against Kevin (Dave? Dan?) Hochevar, who sounds like he should be doing weekend sports for the Valley's choice, KVLY News 11.
It's a Fargo thing.
TOP 1ST
Whoa, the Royals read Cargo like a book there. I can't imagine he's been that far away from stealing the bag.
Justin, that was ugly, if you don't mind me saying. You were waving at that like you were on a float in a parade
BOTTOM 1ST
That was the first Radke comparison tonight by the Royals announcers by my count. Let's keep track!
TOP 2ND
Gotta switch my laundry to the dryer. Let me know if anything exciting happens!
I see nothing exciting has happened.
TOP 3RD
EMH, never can remember that. I'll try for future reference, but I'll forget in about 18 seconds.
Aaaand to the bottom half we go.
BOTTOM 3RD
"Hey, this is A.J. Burnett" Hey A.J.! When are we gonna hang out like you said that one time? Just kidding, but I like his informality with the anonymous viewer.
Touchy touchy, Lefebvre, I'm sure people will understand if you don't pronounce a difficult name the first time!
Could you imagine Bert with a hard name? He'd be like "Manatha- Marsalla - Manowar - fuck it, Johnson."
And Kool Slow D puts down a guy in his first Major League at-bat. And then a quick as lightning double play! So the third inning is over, and the games been going for 38 minutes. We're on pace for a 1:45 game!
TOP 4TH
Oh Scott Ullger, it's like you're just messing with the guys - Stay, slide wait! Backward! Upside down!
While Casilla's pirouette to try to get to the bag was impressive, he probably was out of baseline. At least he didn't try to take the catcher out.
Cuddy! After reader Laurel called you out you're producing!
Confidential to Laurel - can you call out lambda for me? I like him so much, and even more so if he'd produce
The interstitial music showing Rookie starts sounded straight out of a level from Mega Man X2, maybe my favorite SNES game.
Here we go lambda, as soon as I can figure out the Mac keyboard shortcut to make the appropriate greek letter - I will do such a thing.
Well, I suppose I have to give OfJesus some credit there.
BOTTOM 4TH, TWINS 1 ROYALS 0
I'm spending way too much time trying to figure out this lambda keyboard shortcut. But look!
Oh, I'm such a terrible fanboy
I'm glad Mr. Slowey is cruising here - just imagine how he'd be with some more run support. Eh? Eh?
TOP 5TH, SAME
Mr. White sounds so pleasant. How does one get to be that pleasant? I'm certainly not.
2 outs runner on 3rd? I want to see Global Warming at the plate... and of course he comes through. 2 inches short!
(Insert "that's what she said" joke yourself. I'm above that)
Cuddy is swinging a broomstick up there, that's his problem.
BOTTOM 5TH, GOOD GUYS 2 LESS GOOD GUYS 0
Ha, in my google search for "mac keyboard shortcut lambda" this post comes up on the second page! Google, you are frighteningly aware. I won't stop until you sing "Daisies!" Anybody else here seen 2001?
I've said it before: I really really like our young pitching staff. Except Boof.
Remember when I said that if I threw a baseball out of my front door Delmon Young would swing at it? Similarly, if I threw a baseball out of my front door, Carlos Gomez would streak over and catch it. Or at least back up - shit, this is falling apart.
But it doesn't matter, because the Royals are doing their best impression of the 2007 Twins, with this GIDPing!
TOP 6TH, SAME
I enjoy this Lefebvre guy - tells the story of Kubel's hometown Belle Fourche SD - and then says "Well, there you go!" He should have ended it by saying he found 5 dollars.
Mr. White knows his Disney films! I have an unhealthy knowledge of all those mid-90s Disney films.
There goes the baker with his tray like always
The same old bread and rolls to sell
Every morning just the same
Since the moment that we came
To this poor provincial town
OK, enough of that.
Lambda! Way to leg it out! OK, that was Hochevar's fault, but still, awesome.
Teabag has been making some good plays out there, but RB has alerted me to his douchiness, which I no longer doubt.
Otherwise, I like the Royals. I want them to do well when not playing the Twins.
Gotta make like Mike D and get my clothes right out the dryer
Hey, 3 runs! Made it back just in time to see Just in Morneau Strike out
BOTTOM 6TH
RB, good idea.
Waaaay out in front there, Mr.... bat-swinging person.
That may have hit his foot, but he didn't sell the call. Welcome to the bigs, Aviles!
Hillman's trying to do the "pump up my team by getting tossed" thing. But not very well.
TH: What was that, Blue?
UMP: That was a fair ball
TH: You sure?
UMP: Yep
TH: Dang, son
UMP: Nice talking
TH: OK, but I'm very angry right now
RB, I noticed that, and this can get out of hand. It's not just transposing letters "Guadardo," and his name could get very long by the end of the game.
TOP 7TH
I don't know if anybody's done this before, but I fully recommend this method of tee shirt folding - takes like 1/10th the time
There's English versions, but how can you pass up the original Japanese?
RB, that's fun! eJesus would be like a techno-utopian's dream!
BOTTOM 7TH, SPLIT EMBRYOS 5, RULERS CHOSEN BY GOD 0
2nd Brad Radke reference! Shit son, Lefebvre just said they're ALL like Radke
RB, yep, between he and Eric Milton, child laborers in Latin America had to make a TON more baseballs.
I just noticed that! Slawry. Coming up: salary or celery?
7 shutout innings! Good work, Cole Slaw!
TOP 8TH, SAME
Damn! I lost a sock! I feel like Raphael in the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.
RB, I agree. I like this Gomez dood.
I've always hated the word "camaraderie" ... and now you know that.
BOTTOM 8TH, SAME
Casillas: it ain't pretty, but he gets the outs
Celery is in command.
TOP 9TH, SAME
Y'know, the double play doesn't bother me. I just want this game to be over. I feel so dirty when I get this attitude.
RB, true, close call, and lord knows I had a variety of excuses for calling outs or strikes. Too cold, too hungry, etc.
BOTTOM 9TH, SAME
Come on, salary! I also have ears that stick out, so I feel a certain kinship with him.
Yeah, alright guys, cheer for your one run. Congratulations. This is like when I would get my vanity point against David Wright's brother in tennis. Oh yeah, totally name-dropping the fact that I have often played tennis with David Wright's brother.
POSTGAME
One out away from a CG shutout, the CG itself is beautiful, especially for a rookie. I'm gonna be away this weekend up in the District of Columbia, so I will continue to pray for mojo.
I'm kicking myself for giving up on last night's game - I should learn to be more hardcore. But also the Twins should remember that I'm a quarter of a century old, and staying up past midnight too many consecutive days makes me put on my crankypants and tell kids to get off of my lawn. And I don't have a lawn.
Tonight's danger - I made blue cheese cheeseburgers. You know the kind that you put the cheese crumbles between two patties and melt some on top? Oh yeah, that. Best one of those I ever had was at the St. Clair(e?) Broiler. Man, I love that place. I could talk about food all night, and I would, save for the fact that this here is a baseball blog and I shouldn't be so stupid.
Tonight we have Slowey Gin Fizz up against Kevin (Dave? Dan?) Hochevar, who sounds like he should be doing weekend sports for the Valley's choice, KVLY News 11.
It's a Fargo thing.
TOP 1ST
Whoa, the Royals read Cargo like a book there. I can't imagine he's been that far away from stealing the bag.
Justin, that was ugly, if you don't mind me saying. You were waving at that like you were on a float in a parade
BOTTOM 1ST
That was the first Radke comparison tonight by the Royals announcers by my count. Let's keep track!
TOP 2ND
Gotta switch my laundry to the dryer. Let me know if anything exciting happens!
I see nothing exciting has happened.
TOP 3RD
EMH, never can remember that. I'll try for future reference, but I'll forget in about 18 seconds.
Aaaand to the bottom half we go.
BOTTOM 3RD
"Hey, this is A.J. Burnett" Hey A.J.! When are we gonna hang out like you said that one time? Just kidding, but I like his informality with the anonymous viewer.
Touchy touchy, Lefebvre, I'm sure people will understand if you don't pronounce a difficult name the first time!
Could you imagine Bert with a hard name? He'd be like "Manatha- Marsalla - Manowar - fuck it, Johnson."
And Kool Slow D puts down a guy in his first Major League at-bat. And then a quick as lightning double play! So the third inning is over, and the games been going for 38 minutes. We're on pace for a 1:45 game!
TOP 4TH
Oh Scott Ullger, it's like you're just messing with the guys - Stay, slide wait! Backward! Upside down!
While Casilla's pirouette to try to get to the bag was impressive, he probably was out of baseline. At least he didn't try to take the catcher out.
Cuddy! After reader Laurel called you out you're producing!
Confidential to Laurel - can you call out lambda for me? I like him so much, and even more so if he'd produce
The interstitial music showing Rookie starts sounded straight out of a level from Mega Man X2, maybe my favorite SNES game.
Here we go lambda, as soon as I can figure out the Mac keyboard shortcut to make the appropriate greek letter - I will do such a thing.
Well, I suppose I have to give OfJesus some credit there.
BOTTOM 4TH, TWINS 1 ROYALS 0
I'm spending way too much time trying to figure out this lambda keyboard shortcut. But look!
Oh, I'm such a terrible fanboy
I'm glad Mr. Slowey is cruising here - just imagine how he'd be with some more run support. Eh? Eh?
TOP 5TH, SAME
Mr. White sounds so pleasant. How does one get to be that pleasant? I'm certainly not.
2 outs runner on 3rd? I want to see Global Warming at the plate... and of course he comes through. 2 inches short!
(Insert "that's what she said" joke yourself. I'm above that)
Cuddy is swinging a broomstick up there, that's his problem.
BOTTOM 5TH, GOOD GUYS 2 LESS GOOD GUYS 0
Ha, in my google search for "mac keyboard shortcut lambda" this post comes up on the second page! Google, you are frighteningly aware. I won't stop until you sing "Daisies!" Anybody else here seen 2001?
I've said it before: I really really like our young pitching staff. Except Boof.
Remember when I said that if I threw a baseball out of my front door Delmon Young would swing at it? Similarly, if I threw a baseball out of my front door, Carlos Gomez would streak over and catch it. Or at least back up - shit, this is falling apart.
But it doesn't matter, because the Royals are doing their best impression of the 2007 Twins, with this GIDPing!
TOP 6TH, SAME
I enjoy this Lefebvre guy - tells the story of Kubel's hometown Belle Fourche SD - and then says "Well, there you go!" He should have ended it by saying he found 5 dollars.
Mr. White knows his Disney films! I have an unhealthy knowledge of all those mid-90s Disney films.
There goes the baker with his tray like always
The same old bread and rolls to sell
Every morning just the same
Since the moment that we came
To this poor provincial town
OK, enough of that.
Lambda! Way to leg it out! OK, that was Hochevar's fault, but still, awesome.
Teabag has been making some good plays out there, but RB has alerted me to his douchiness, which I no longer doubt.
Otherwise, I like the Royals. I want them to do well when not playing the Twins.
Gotta make like Mike D and get my clothes right out the dryer
Hey, 3 runs! Made it back just in time to see Just in Morneau Strike out
BOTTOM 6TH
RB, good idea.
Waaaay out in front there, Mr.... bat-swinging person.
That may have hit his foot, but he didn't sell the call. Welcome to the bigs, Aviles!
Hillman's trying to do the "pump up my team by getting tossed" thing. But not very well.
TH: What was that, Blue?
UMP: That was a fair ball
TH: You sure?
UMP: Yep
TH: Dang, son
UMP: Nice talking
TH: OK, but I'm very angry right now
RB, I noticed that, and this can get out of hand. It's not just transposing letters "Guadardo," and his name could get very long by the end of the game.
TOP 7TH
I don't know if anybody's done this before, but I fully recommend this method of tee shirt folding - takes like 1/10th the time
There's English versions, but how can you pass up the original Japanese?
RB, that's fun! eJesus would be like a techno-utopian's dream!
BOTTOM 7TH, SPLIT EMBRYOS 5, RULERS CHOSEN BY GOD 0
2nd Brad Radke reference! Shit son, Lefebvre just said they're ALL like Radke
RB, yep, between he and Eric Milton, child laborers in Latin America had to make a TON more baseballs.
I just noticed that! Slawry. Coming up: salary or celery?
7 shutout innings! Good work, Cole Slaw!
TOP 8TH, SAME
Damn! I lost a sock! I feel like Raphael in the first Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.
RB, I agree. I like this Gomez dood.
I've always hated the word "camaraderie" ... and now you know that.
BOTTOM 8TH, SAME
Casillas: it ain't pretty, but he gets the outs
Celery is in command.
TOP 9TH, SAME
Y'know, the double play doesn't bother me. I just want this game to be over. I feel so dirty when I get this attitude.
RB, true, close call, and lord knows I had a variety of excuses for calling outs or strikes. Too cold, too hungry, etc.
BOTTOM 9TH, SAME
Come on, salary! I also have ears that stick out, so I feel a certain kinship with him.
Yeah, alright guys, cheer for your one run. Congratulations. This is like when I would get my vanity point against David Wright's brother in tennis. Oh yeah, totally name-dropping the fact that I have often played tennis with David Wright's brother.
POSTGAME
One out away from a CG shutout, the CG itself is beautiful, especially for a rookie. I'm gonna be away this weekend up in the District of Columbia, so I will continue to pray for mojo.
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
The FUTURE
PREGAME
I know I speak for WV as well when I say that at PAB, we have democratic (small d) considerations. As in, we like things that are democratic, not that we care much for the American electoral spectrum.
ANYWAY
So we're looking at this app called ScribbleLive. It would allow people to put stuff on one post (or so I think, WV runs the technical stuff here, and that's why the Praise/Bury hasn't been updated in years). Because we love the chaos of a bunch of people clamoring, I try to address comments that we get in the posts themselves, but I think ideally we'd move to posts made up entirely of comments from us and hell, anybody else who felt like piping up. I'm intrigued by these possibilities, more as this develops.
Whooooooa, we're halfway there
TOP 1ST
Well, so far ZackMorris Greinke is on pace to strike out 27
Good work, Joe, breaking that up
BOTTOM 1ST
Oh Bon Jovi. Not a great start. This does not bode well.
Bases loaded, nobody out, just where you want them!
2 outs for one run is about the best we could have hoped for there. Let's hope Greinke doesn't get all Nick Blackburn on the good guys.
Now shake it off, Bon Jovi, settle down, and go 7.
TOP 2ND, MINNY 0 KCITY 1
Oh bother.
BOTTOM 2ND, SAME
I really do enjoy these announcers. When they were talking about the hard times, I thought of that song from Strongbad's 100th email:
And this little weirdo
Would be a modestly hot girl
To help me through the hard times
You know the kind that's only sorta hot
So she won't mess around with other guys
Anybody know what I'm talking about?
Brendan Harris made a good play, that, if the Antichrist from Kalamazoo (Jeter, for those not in the know) made, there would be a 30 minute Sports Center special about it the next day.
TOP 3RD, SAME
Hey hey Kayla, no worries: I never assume it's me!
Ah, here it is:
I can't wait for Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People coming to a Wii near me!
Mike λ Pierzynskis one the opposite way. Remember when AJ had 400 of those hits in like 2002?
Cargo, getting it done. I remember when Michael Kay called Alfonso Soriano "AlSo" and that was stupid. Perhaps Cargo will wear thin on me.
Unless we called him Gap Cargo Pants for teenagers who wear two much cologne (GCP4TWW2MC)
When I coached baseball, I once had a pitcher who balked 3 times in a row. True story.
It was JV.
I kinda like that techno beat outro. Oompa oompa TECHNOCHOCOLATE
BOTTOM 3RD, TWINGOS 2 ROYALES 1
Bon Jovi: Sharp as brie.
The little castle's Web Gem is helping you out Livan, you owe him a pizza.
TOP 4TH, GEMINI 2 ROIS 3
Ugh, someone tell me a joke please
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
Oh, I'm sorry, I fell asleep
Runners on, fewer than two outs? That's Livan for you tonight.
Kayla, I don't think I've defended Dlmon much here, except to criticize that he hasn't done what the Twins brought him over to do. If I am on a bandwagon though, please believe it's Kubel's. I am a Kubelaniac.
?
EMH, you're right, we'll need a running gag, a turn of words, a crossword puzzle, and WHAT THE HELL, DELMON YOUNG?!
OK, a joke, a gag, a pratfall, a shot and a beer should do the trick
TOP 5, MN 2 KC 6
To answer Lefebvre's question: "How often do you see such and such guy lead off the next inning?"
Your chances are 1/9, or .111, monsieur.
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
That 4-6-3, was, as the H to the O-V might have said in 2004 was "so necessary." Wow, that was the most obfuscating Jay-Z reference ever.
TOP 6TH, SAME
"Young Lamb... Mutton!" There was the joke! Thank you, Ryan Lefebvre!
They showed Bert again! I miss you still, Bert! My life is (even more) empty without you!
Starting to look at my watch here.
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
Consecutive goose eggs from Bon Jovi! But I fear we may be too late. We have our joke, now I'm going to get my beer, and maybe a crossword puzzle. Oh yeah, I do the crossword every day, big whoop, wanna fight about it?
TOP 7TH
The Rubik's Kubel justifies my confidence in him
Jesus, I thought that was Robert Redford in the dugout there for a second
Holy Moroni, we scored a run!
/Mormon joke
And then squandered opportunities. I don't want to mail it in, because I am HARDCORE, but I am losing hope that we can extend the Royale w/ Cheez' losing streak
BOTTOM 7TH, LIGHT HITTING TWINS 3 THE REGALS 6
And with that misplay by Cuddy, I say:
ON STRIKE
I know I speak for WV as well when I say that at PAB, we have democratic (small d) considerations. As in, we like things that are democratic, not that we care much for the American electoral spectrum.
ANYWAY
So we're looking at this app called ScribbleLive. It would allow people to put stuff on one post (or so I think, WV runs the technical stuff here, and that's why the Praise/Bury hasn't been updated in years). Because we love the chaos of a bunch of people clamoring, I try to address comments that we get in the posts themselves, but I think ideally we'd move to posts made up entirely of comments from us and hell, anybody else who felt like piping up. I'm intrigued by these possibilities, more as this develops.
Whooooooa, we're halfway there
TOP 1ST
Well, so far Zack
Good work, Joe, breaking that up
BOTTOM 1ST
Oh Bon Jovi. Not a great start. This does not bode well.
Bases loaded, nobody out, just where you want them!
2 outs for one run is about the best we could have hoped for there. Let's hope Greinke doesn't get all Nick Blackburn on the good guys.
Now shake it off, Bon Jovi, settle down, and go 7.
TOP 2ND, MINNY 0 KCITY 1
Oh bother.
BOTTOM 2ND, SAME
I really do enjoy these announcers. When they were talking about the hard times, I thought of that song from Strongbad's 100th email:
And this little weirdo
Would be a modestly hot girl
To help me through the hard times
You know the kind that's only sorta hot
So she won't mess around with other guys
Anybody know what I'm talking about?
Brendan Harris made a good play, that, if the Antichrist from Kalamazoo (Jeter, for those not in the know) made, there would be a 30 minute Sports Center special about it the next day.
TOP 3RD, SAME
Hey hey Kayla, no worries: I never assume it's me!
Ah, here it is:
I can't wait for Strong Bad's Cool Game For Attractive People coming to a Wii near me!
Mike λ Pierzynskis one the opposite way. Remember when AJ had 400 of those hits in like 2002?
Cargo, getting it done. I remember when Michael Kay called Alfonso Soriano "AlSo" and that was stupid. Perhaps Cargo will wear thin on me.
Unless we called him Gap Cargo Pants for teenagers who wear two much cologne (GCP4TWW2MC)
When I coached baseball, I once had a pitcher who balked 3 times in a row. True story.
It was JV.
I kinda like that techno beat outro. Oompa oompa TECHNOCHOCOLATE
BOTTOM 3RD, TWINGOS 2 ROYALES 1
Bon Jovi: Sharp as brie.
The little castle's Web Gem is helping you out Livan, you owe him a pizza.
TOP 4TH, GEMINI 2 ROIS 3
Ugh, someone tell me a joke please
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
Oh, I'm sorry, I fell asleep
Runners on, fewer than two outs? That's Livan for you tonight.
Kayla, I don't think I've defended Dlmon much here, except to criticize that he hasn't done what the Twins brought him over to do. If I am on a bandwagon though, please believe it's Kubel's. I am a Kubelaniac.
?
EMH, you're right, we'll need a running gag, a turn of words, a crossword puzzle, and WHAT THE HELL, DELMON YOUNG?!
OK, a joke, a gag, a pratfall, a shot and a beer should do the trick
TOP 5, MN 2 KC 6
To answer Lefebvre's question: "How often do you see such and such guy lead off the next inning?"
Your chances are 1/9, or .111, monsieur.
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
That 4-6-3, was, as the H to the O-V might have said in 2004 was "so necessary." Wow, that was the most obfuscating Jay-Z reference ever.
TOP 6TH, SAME
"Young Lamb... Mutton!" There was the joke! Thank you, Ryan Lefebvre!
They showed Bert again! I miss you still, Bert! My life is (even more) empty without you!
Starting to look at my watch here.
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
Consecutive goose eggs from Bon Jovi! But I fear we may be too late. We have our joke, now I'm going to get my beer, and maybe a crossword puzzle. Oh yeah, I do the crossword every day, big whoop, wanna fight about it?
TOP 7TH
The Rubik's Kubel justifies my confidence in him
Jesus, I thought that was Robert Redford in the dugout there for a second
Holy Moroni, we scored a run!
/Mormon joke
And then squandered opportunities. I don't want to mail it in, because I am HARDCORE, but I am losing hope that we can extend the Royale w/ Cheez' losing streak
BOTTOM 7TH, LIGHT HITTING TWINS 3 THE REGALS 6
And with that misplay by Cuddy, I say:
ON STRIKE
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Calves of Fire
PREGAME
Hey everybody, hope you all had a blast on Memorial Day, grilling out, fishing... um, grilling those fish, perhaps, for synergy's sake. I climbed a mountain over the weekend. Just one day actually, and the mountain isn't too terribly tall (1500ft. ascent) But holy hell are my legs sore still. I could try to make a parallel to a major leaguer's regimen of playing every day and the toll that must take on their bodies. But instead all I'll say is this: peanut butter sandwiches never taste so good as when you're on a hike.
Tonight's pitching match-up is downright mythical: The Dread PirateRoberts Blackbeard vs. The Incredible Hulk (I can never remember if it's Bruce or David Bannister in the story. Maybe it's both depending on the source. I'm easily confused).
TOP 1ST
Oh, I still have some time. I don't know if I've addressed this or not, but WV hasn't been around much because he is still in school, that sucker. Because the Cardinal is on a quarter system, he pretty much bets done in mid-June. So he's taking a sabbatical to write papers and grants and... all that other shit.
Me? I'm a test subject! I run on a treadmill for a little while with electrodes on to measure my gait and stuff. I dunno. They pay me for it.
Hm, one of the announcers' last names is Lefebvre. I certainly use Henri Lefebvre in my thesis a lot THAT YOU CAN'T SEE FOR THREE YEARS. Not that you were looking. Ahem.
Aaand 3 quick outs
BOTTOM1ST
To me, it looked like Gathwright got picked off. Seems to me that if your name is Gathwright, you'd be better suited to being a character in an Oscar Wilde play instead of being a ball player.
I see I added a W in Gathright's name, but Blackbeard added a K to Gordon's name! Hey-o!
TOP 2ND
"Cuddyer was looking for everything but that fastball, right down the middle"
"Heh heh, what else could he have been looking for? Heh heh."
You better watch your tone, mister.
I still believe in you, Koobull.
I have the impression that if I opened my door and threw a baseball out of my apartment, Delmon Young would swing at it.
BOTTOM 2ND
The one bright spot in these mlb.tv commercials: the All-Star voting is set to the tune of "National Anthem" by Radiohead. Good tune off a good album (Kid A)
"He couldn't have hit that one any better than that" respectfully, anonymous announcer for whom inflection classes would help, hitting it not to the left fielder would have been a better hit. Oh, but I'm probably just a stat freak who hates the game
3-pitch inning!
TOP 3RD
And-a movin' right along. Man, the wind is really keeping the balls in tonight. It's like the Metrodome ca. 1988
BOTTOM 3RD
Man, Blackburn is just throwing it up there. I like it.
What an awkward swing from OfJesus
Pulled the chain! Sir Worthington Gathright, you may need to refresh yourself with cucumber sandwiches and a whiff of smelling salts; I do believe you have the vapors!
TOP 4TH
elizabeth, I'm not entirely sure what you're talking about, but I like that style. Are we talking about Gathright? I'm not exactly what people would call "smart."
Little castle! Breaking up the DP!
Oh EMH, it's you! I enjoy the name of your blog much. Madeline L'Engle's book confused me as a child. Still probably does.
Cuddly McDimples does not inspire a great deal of hope within my heart.
THAT BALL WAS FAIR. FAIR FAIR FAIRE. FAYRE. FAY-ER. FARE.
But I'll settle for a solitary RBI
BOTTOM 4TH TWINS 2 ROYALS 0
Oh that's rich. Announcers talking about how all the Twins pitchers throw strikes, then they show a shot of Bonser & Herzegovina.
Nice.
TOP 5TH, SAME
Hm, I have read The Importance of Being Earnest and even though it's one of my favorite plays, I can't recall that part. Oh well. Have you seen the version with Colin Firth? From 2001 I think? Good stuff.
RB, who is this Ryan Lefebvre guy? I enjoy his name. Very French. "All those letters? Fuck it, just don't pronounce the last 3" kinda thing.
"Pretty soon you'll look at your cell phone and say 'Taco!' and it'll ask 'Hard or soft shell?'" This Lefebvre guy is certainly number 3 after Dick and Bert.
Hm, that was underwhelming. Let's see if Cuddy can do something.
Cuddly?! What are you doing?!
In case any of you have burgeoning anger salad:
BOTTOM 5TH, MN 3 KC 0
Blackburn used to be a little tubby, huh? I never would have guessed. All I really heard was chicken something and 260 lbs and I'm just gonna piece that together in my head.
TOP 6TH SAME
That was all nature's fault, Komrade Kubel.
Bert! Hey Bert! I miss you Bert! It's not weird at all!
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
EMH, oh yes, now I recall. And spot on in re: Colin Ferth. He's in good stuff. Except that one with Emma Thompson where she's the nanny... Nanny McPhee? Shit's terrible.
Yeesh, stacey, I'll say. And how, exactly, does one find this work?
Blackburn is averaging 11 pitches per inning, with no walks. He does remind you a little bit of old Dark Beard, doesn't he? I wonder what he's up to? Besides fishing? You're absolutely correct, RB. He's efficient like... keeping a toothbrush in the shower. No, I don't like that. Help me out here people.
TOP 7TH
Haha, RB, accurate, but unpleasant.
Now that's just dumb luck, CarGo. Oh my, I think we have a new nickname.
RB, at first it sounded like Mr. White was being condescending, but now I see he's just genteel, which I like. But I don't believe in editing!
I'll look into it stacey. I'm all about finding stuff here at the Biomedical Engineering science blah blah blah. They're always looking for the perspective of social science people for the stuff they write. "No ma'am, that's not a metaphor, that's metonymy." Stuff like that.
The Twins did not score.
BOTTOM 7TH, SAME
What did Silva do in 2005? 78 pitch CG? Seems the 1st inning may prevent that for Blackbeard, but I'm still tres impressed.
Haha, RB, I've never played "The Show," but the Bigs 2006 for my Wii allows me to have 27 K games with Santana. Which I like.
TOP 8TH
In your drinking game, RB, my only saving grace would be that I often have to spell Lefebvre. Otherwise, done.
THE PAB DRINKING GAME. A DRINK WHEN SOMEONE:
-Mentions or youtube embed an 80s song
-Goes a half inning without talking about baseball at all
-Mentions Junior High
-Makes up a stat
-Guesses at someone's name
I'm mainly ambivalent toward the Teahen, RB, but I'm ambivalent toward a lot of things.
Like I'm not gonna let that Kubel K get to me.
BOTTOM 8TH, SAME
Here's the question: if Bburn continues on the way he is, do you let him close it out? I know the answer to this question is obvious, but still.
RB, I like your style. You also answered the obvious question before it was asked. Of course you bring in T'n'P here.
Unless, of course, the Twins pile on.
TOP 9TH
For what it's worth, Sonic isn't all that great, RB. Are there In n Outs near you? Hot damn those are good.
RB, one of my tools is also "Hint of Lime" tostitos
Good batwork, Cargo. Score a run to give Blackbeard a shot at a CG.
It's true, RB, Carlos has about as many major league walks as I do. Which is zero. True fact.
Whoa, Mr. White has had some coffee. "zeezeedeedee situation you're in the situation all of a sudden zoobiedoobie situation you wanted to be in situation situation"
BOTTOM 9TH
Blackbeard, out to finish that which he hath begun!
Sure, RB, life is all about choices. We have 5 guys around here, which is like a quasi-In-N-Out
I do believe a 27-pitch perfect game with no assists would be even more perfect than an 81-pitch CG with 27K
Good work, kid, but it's time to to bring in Mr. Nathan. I think if this wasn't Blackburn's first pair of sideburns, Gardy'd live him in, but that's a hell of an effort.
Oh God oh God oh God
ANGER SALAD
I suppose that's gonna happen. Perhaps Dlmon could have played that differently. Can't help but think
TOP 10TH FREE BLOGGING
I feel bad not having any confidence in Cuddy. I just can't help it.
Haha, Nibbish, it's true, like "Ah hell, I tried. When do we eat?"
It's true, Laurel, that's devastating. At least WE all know that W-L doesn't mean shit. Still.
Sigh.
BOTTOM 10TH
I could be watching Good Eats right now! It's a sirloin episode, too! But my loyalty lies here.
Yes, round is a shape.
(holds breath)
*whew*
TOP 11TH
Young Young, redeem thyself!
Or... do that
This... is... depressing. Come on lambda
I don't know what to say anymore. This game emotionally drains me.
BOTTOM 11TH
At some point, I'll figure out what in God's sweet hell Gomez was thinking
I still have some love for the Crainadian. Sorry I'm not really writing sentences, but this is how I get in high stress situations. You should have seen me in my defense.
I pace and I twitch and rub my face and clean and make cookies. Not really, but I should.
TOP 12TH
Cuddy! Cuddy! My boy! My beautiful Virginian!
Walking to get to Dlmon? Can't really argue with that one.
It would indeed be satisfied if Young did *something*
I meant something besides Grounding into a double play, you... you... Oh, fuck it.
BOTTOM 12TH
What's this Sweet Escape song? I've stopped blogging and am just responding to all your wonderful comments. Takes my mind off the game and are far more entertaining
Guerrierrierrierrierrierr looks pretty good here, not gonna lie. Basically I'm just trying not to pee.
RB, exactly. Probably should have left Blackburn in there. Probably. But what are you gonna do?
Oh thank Jebus.
POSTGAME
I'm just too drained. Thanks for the company, everybody, you make this more fun.
Hey everybody, hope you all had a blast on Memorial Day, grilling out, fishing... um, grilling those fish, perhaps, for synergy's sake. I climbed a mountain over the weekend. Just one day actually, and the mountain isn't too terribly tall (1500ft. ascent) But holy hell are my legs sore still. I could try to make a parallel to a major leaguer's regimen of playing every day and the toll that must take on their bodies. But instead all I'll say is this: peanut butter sandwiches never taste so good as when you're on a hike.
Tonight's pitching match-up is downright mythical: The Dread Pirate
TOP 1ST
Oh, I still have some time. I don't know if I've addressed this or not, but WV hasn't been around much because he is still in school, that sucker. Because the Cardinal is on a quarter system, he pretty much bets done in mid-June. So he's taking a sabbatical to write papers and grants and... all that other shit.
Me? I'm a test subject! I run on a treadmill for a little while with electrodes on to measure my gait and stuff. I dunno. They pay me for it.
Hm, one of the announcers' last names is Lefebvre. I certainly use Henri Lefebvre in my thesis a lot THAT YOU CAN'T SEE FOR THREE YEARS. Not that you were looking. Ahem.
Aaand 3 quick outs
BOTTOM1ST
To me, it looked like Gathwright got picked off. Seems to me that if your name is Gathwright, you'd be better suited to being a character in an Oscar Wilde play instead of being a ball player.
I see I added a W in Gathright's name, but Blackbeard added a K to Gordon's name! Hey-o!
TOP 2ND
"Cuddyer was looking for everything but that fastball, right down the middle"
"Heh heh, what else could he have been looking for? Heh heh."
You better watch your tone, mister.
I still believe in you, Koobull.
I have the impression that if I opened my door and threw a baseball out of my apartment, Delmon Young would swing at it.
BOTTOM 2ND
The one bright spot in these mlb.tv commercials: the All-Star voting is set to the tune of "National Anthem" by Radiohead. Good tune off a good album (Kid A)
"He couldn't have hit that one any better than that" respectfully, anonymous announcer for whom inflection classes would help, hitting it not to the left fielder would have been a better hit. Oh, but I'm probably just a stat freak who hates the game
3-pitch inning!
TOP 3RD
And-a movin' right along. Man, the wind is really keeping the balls in tonight. It's like the Metrodome ca. 1988
BOTTOM 3RD
Man, Blackburn is just throwing it up there. I like it.
What an awkward swing from OfJesus
Pulled the chain! Sir Worthington Gathright, you may need to refresh yourself with cucumber sandwiches and a whiff of smelling salts; I do believe you have the vapors!
TOP 4TH
elizabeth, I'm not entirely sure what you're talking about, but I like that style. Are we talking about Gathright? I'm not exactly what people would call "smart."
Little castle! Breaking up the DP!
Oh EMH, it's you! I enjoy the name of your blog much. Madeline L'Engle's book confused me as a child. Still probably does.
Cuddly McDimples does not inspire a great deal of hope within my heart.
THAT BALL WAS FAIR. FAIR FAIR FAIRE. FAYRE. FAY-ER. FARE.
But I'll settle for a solitary RBI
BOTTOM 4TH TWINS 2 ROYALS 0
Oh that's rich. Announcers talking about how all the Twins pitchers throw strikes, then they show a shot of Bonser & Herzegovina.
Nice.
TOP 5TH, SAME
Hm, I have read The Importance of Being Earnest and even though it's one of my favorite plays, I can't recall that part. Oh well. Have you seen the version with Colin Firth? From 2001 I think? Good stuff.
RB, who is this Ryan Lefebvre guy? I enjoy his name. Very French. "All those letters? Fuck it, just don't pronounce the last 3" kinda thing.
"Pretty soon you'll look at your cell phone and say 'Taco!' and it'll ask 'Hard or soft shell?'" This Lefebvre guy is certainly number 3 after Dick and Bert.
Hm, that was underwhelming. Let's see if Cuddy can do something.
Cuddly?! What are you doing?!
In case any of you have burgeoning anger salad:
BOTTOM 5TH, MN 3 KC 0
Blackburn used to be a little tubby, huh? I never would have guessed. All I really heard was chicken something and 260 lbs and I'm just gonna piece that together in my head.
TOP 6TH SAME
That was all nature's fault, Komrade Kubel.
Bert! Hey Bert! I miss you Bert! It's not weird at all!
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
EMH, oh yes, now I recall. And spot on in re: Colin Ferth. He's in good stuff. Except that one with Emma Thompson where she's the nanny... Nanny McPhee? Shit's terrible.
Yeesh, stacey, I'll say. And how, exactly, does one find this work?
Blackburn is averaging 11 pitches per inning, with no walks. He does remind you a little bit of old Dark Beard, doesn't he? I wonder what he's up to? Besides fishing? You're absolutely correct, RB. He's efficient like... keeping a toothbrush in the shower. No, I don't like that. Help me out here people.
TOP 7TH
Haha, RB, accurate, but unpleasant.
Now that's just dumb luck, CarGo. Oh my, I think we have a new nickname.
RB, at first it sounded like Mr. White was being condescending, but now I see he's just genteel, which I like. But I don't believe in editing!
I'll look into it stacey. I'm all about finding stuff here at the Biomedical Engineering science blah blah blah. They're always looking for the perspective of social science people for the stuff they write. "No ma'am, that's not a metaphor, that's metonymy." Stuff like that.
The Twins did not score.
BOTTOM 7TH, SAME
What did Silva do in 2005? 78 pitch CG? Seems the 1st inning may prevent that for Blackbeard, but I'm still tres impressed.
Haha, RB, I've never played "The Show," but the Bigs 2006 for my Wii allows me to have 27 K games with Santana. Which I like.
TOP 8TH
In your drinking game, RB, my only saving grace would be that I often have to spell Lefebvre. Otherwise, done.
THE PAB DRINKING GAME. A DRINK WHEN SOMEONE:
-Mentions or youtube embed an 80s song
-Goes a half inning without talking about baseball at all
-Mentions Junior High
-Makes up a stat
-Guesses at someone's name
I'm mainly ambivalent toward the Teahen, RB, but I'm ambivalent toward a lot of things.
Like I'm not gonna let that Kubel K get to me.
BOTTOM 8TH, SAME
Here's the question: if Bburn continues on the way he is, do you let him close it out? I know the answer to this question is obvious, but still.
RB, I like your style. You also answered the obvious question before it was asked. Of course you bring in T'n'P here.
Unless, of course, the Twins pile on.
TOP 9TH
For what it's worth, Sonic isn't all that great, RB. Are there In n Outs near you? Hot damn those are good.
RB, one of my tools is also "Hint of Lime" tostitos
Good batwork, Cargo. Score a run to give Blackbeard a shot at a CG.
It's true, RB, Carlos has about as many major league walks as I do. Which is zero. True fact.
Whoa, Mr. White has had some coffee. "zeezeedeedee situation you're in the situation all of a sudden zoobiedoobie situation you wanted to be in situation situation"
BOTTOM 9TH
Blackbeard, out to finish that which he hath begun!
Sure, RB, life is all about choices. We have 5 guys around here, which is like a quasi-In-N-Out
I do believe a 27-pitch perfect game with no assists would be even more perfect than an 81-pitch CG with 27K
Good work, kid, but it's time to to bring in Mr. Nathan. I think if this wasn't Blackburn's first pair of sideburns, Gardy'd live him in, but that's a hell of an effort.
Oh God oh God oh God
ANGER SALAD
I suppose that's gonna happen. Perhaps Dlmon could have played that differently. Can't help but think
TOP 10TH FREE BLOGGING
I feel bad not having any confidence in Cuddy. I just can't help it.
Haha, Nibbish, it's true, like "Ah hell, I tried. When do we eat?"
It's true, Laurel, that's devastating. At least WE all know that W-L doesn't mean shit. Still.
Sigh.
BOTTOM 10TH
I could be watching Good Eats right now! It's a sirloin episode, too! But my loyalty lies here.
Yes, round is a shape.
(holds breath)
*whew*
TOP 11TH
Young Young, redeem thyself!
Or... do that
This... is... depressing. Come on lambda
I don't know what to say anymore. This game emotionally drains me.
BOTTOM 11TH
At some point, I'll figure out what in God's sweet hell Gomez was thinking
I still have some love for the Crainadian. Sorry I'm not really writing sentences, but this is how I get in high stress situations. You should have seen me in my defense.
I pace and I twitch and rub my face and clean and make cookies. Not really, but I should.
TOP 12TH
Cuddy! Cuddy! My boy! My beautiful Virginian!
Walking to get to Dlmon? Can't really argue with that one.
It would indeed be satisfied if Young did *something*
I meant something besides Grounding into a double play, you... you... Oh, fuck it.
BOTTOM 12TH
What's this Sweet Escape song? I've stopped blogging and am just responding to all your wonderful comments. Takes my mind off the game and are far more entertaining
Guerrierrierrierrierrierr looks pretty good here, not gonna lie. Basically I'm just trying not to pee.
RB, exactly. Probably should have left Blackburn in there. Probably. But what are you gonna do?
Oh thank Jebus.
POSTGAME
I'm just too drained. Thanks for the company, everybody, you make this more fun.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Eli's Coming
TOP 1ST
No pregame today, but who's counting? There's nuts on Good Eats, and lord knows I love me a nut or two. I really like cashews, but I would argue that pistachios are the best nuts on the planet
And Nikolai Blackburn is looking good so far. Whaddya suppose the odds are Boof joins the bullpen? Because there's just not enough righties in the bulllpen.
Hamilton needs to sit down and think about all those RsBI he has. He uh, has a lot. Probably more than the entire Twins roster
BOTTOM 1ST
Speedy Go[m]ez, even you can't bunt super hard like that and beat it out.
Look at it this way NOT Wade Boggs, you gave some guy a souvenir.
Mauer is just giving the Pontoon the business at the plate, which is good to see. Even when he's in the hole, he's a cool hitter in the box.
The other JM almost beat the shift, but you gotta tip your cap on that play. The pontoon, not so good of late, and hey, I like this above .500 thing, so we should uh, keep that going.
And that's baseball analysis, son.
TOP 2ND
I hear facebook is undergoing some changes soon, so that'll be interesting. I'm new to that world, but I'm comfortable with how things are. I resist change!
Also, Operaion! Game of Life got out, followed quickly by... the next guy? Let's guess... Shelton.
It was Murphy
You'd think I wouldn't be so lazy - I can just look to the right of the screen and see. But I think guessing is fun!
BOTTOM 2ND
What happened? Why is Clue Chinese Checkers so mad? Did he get bounced?
Boy, that Michael Young is a pretty good shortstop. Remember a few years ago when the Rangers had Young, Blalock, Delucci and Teixeira? That was good for them. The end. Of the story.
There'll be some technical difficulties here. Playing with my Airport Extreme (totally a Mac fanboy here)... back when I'm back
BOTTOM 5TH
You know who I want broadcasting the apocalypse? TK. Dude would keep me calm as I melted away into a carbon shadow. How are the good guys not scoring any runs against the pontoon?
TOP 6TH
Meal or no meal! I get it! I'm totally ignoring that home run by Young for the time being. I wish our Young had a home run. That'd be the awesometime.
Um.
So I finally get my Wii hooked up to the internets, and all of a sudden Blackburn has given up 7 runs? This does not bode well my find four-fendered friends.
Reader Laurel is at the game tonight - but will she stay? Of course, because she is the hardcore.
BOTTOM 6TH
Brightside McGee says: at least they didn't get shut out
7TH
Where was this pontoon when he was pitching for us? Hm?
TOP 8TH
We need some lolTwins. Perhaps I'll make some. Perhaps I'm in a pissy mood, I don't know. But uh, when I get Super Smash Brothers Brawl I'll totally play with someone on the internet.
As you can tell, I don't exactly have a "summer job" yet.
Rincon is perhaps trying to recapture some of Santana's magic with the goatee. It's not exactly working, but he did get in 2 solid innings of work, so I suppose that's good.
BOTTOM 8TH
I see how silly it looks in print for a 25 year oldboy man to talk about summer jobs, but I am a student after all, so it's totes OK.
I hate these damn commercials on mlb.tv
Holy hell, do I hate them
TOP 9TH
You know what I've been listening to lately? M83. They're not exactly new, but their latest album Saturday = Youth is an excellent 80s style disc. They make the music unironically, unlike most groups who do 80s music. But you all know how much I love the 80s music, even though I only had cognizant memories from the last couple years.
Oh God please make it stop. Just put the horse down.
BOTTOM 9TH
No! We rally!
Well, probably not, but you gotta believe. I vaguely recall the Team with the Racially Insensitive name that plays near Lake Erie coming back for like, 10 runs in Seattle. But that was 2001. I think. Or it was the other way around. I really don't know of which I speak.
Seeing the pontoon out there to try and get a complete games makes me angry
Well
POSTGAME
What did we learn? Boof's black magic of succumbing to the big inning seems to be rubbing off on the other starters. The occasional gopherball is OK, but not when there are people on base. But I have a feeling they'll bounce back and beat Padilla (not the terrorist) tomorrow.
No pregame today, but who's counting? There's nuts on Good Eats, and lord knows I love me a nut or two. I really like cashews, but I would argue that pistachios are the best nuts on the planet
And Nikolai Blackburn is looking good so far. Whaddya suppose the odds are Boof joins the bullpen? Because there's just not enough righties in the bulllpen.
Hamilton needs to sit down and think about all those RsBI he has. He uh, has a lot. Probably more than the entire Twins roster
BOTTOM 1ST
Speedy Go[m]ez, even you can't bunt super hard like that and beat it out.
Look at it this way NOT Wade Boggs, you gave some guy a souvenir.
Mauer is just giving the Pontoon the business at the plate, which is good to see. Even when he's in the hole, he's a cool hitter in the box.
The other JM almost beat the shift, but you gotta tip your cap on that play. The pontoon, not so good of late, and hey, I like this above .500 thing, so we should uh, keep that going.
And that's baseball analysis, son.
TOP 2ND
I hear facebook is undergoing some changes soon, so that'll be interesting. I'm new to that world, but I'm comfortable with how things are. I resist change!
Also, Operaion! Game of Life got out, followed quickly by... the next guy? Let's guess... Shelton.
It was Murphy
You'd think I wouldn't be so lazy - I can just look to the right of the screen and see. But I think guessing is fun!
BOTTOM 2ND
What happened? Why is Clue Chinese Checkers so mad? Did he get bounced?
Boy, that Michael Young is a pretty good shortstop. Remember a few years ago when the Rangers had Young, Blalock, Delucci and Teixeira? That was good for them. The end. Of the story.
There'll be some technical difficulties here. Playing with my Airport Extreme (totally a Mac fanboy here)... back when I'm back
BOTTOM 5TH
You know who I want broadcasting the apocalypse? TK. Dude would keep me calm as I melted away into a carbon shadow. How are the good guys not scoring any runs against the pontoon?
TOP 6TH
Meal or no meal! I get it! I'm totally ignoring that home run by Young for the time being. I wish our Young had a home run. That'd be the awesometime.
Um.
So I finally get my Wii hooked up to the internets, and all of a sudden Blackburn has given up 7 runs? This does not bode well my find four-fendered friends.
Reader Laurel is at the game tonight - but will she stay? Of course, because she is the hardcore.
BOTTOM 6TH
Brightside McGee says: at least they didn't get shut out
7TH
Where was this pontoon when he was pitching for us? Hm?
TOP 8TH
We need some lolTwins. Perhaps I'll make some. Perhaps I'm in a pissy mood, I don't know. But uh, when I get Super Smash Brothers Brawl I'll totally play with someone on the internet.
As you can tell, I don't exactly have a "summer job" yet.
Rincon is perhaps trying to recapture some of Santana's magic with the goatee. It's not exactly working, but he did get in 2 solid innings of work, so I suppose that's good.
BOTTOM 8TH
I see how silly it looks in print for a 25 year old
I hate these damn commercials on mlb.tv
Holy hell, do I hate them
TOP 9TH
You know what I've been listening to lately? M83. They're not exactly new, but their latest album Saturday = Youth is an excellent 80s style disc. They make the music unironically, unlike most groups who do 80s music. But you all know how much I love the 80s music, even though I only had cognizant memories from the last couple years.
Oh God please make it stop. Just put the horse down.
BOTTOM 9TH
No! We rally!
Well, probably not, but you gotta believe. I vaguely recall the Team with the Racially Insensitive name that plays near Lake Erie coming back for like, 10 runs in Seattle. But that was 2001. I think. Or it was the other way around. I really don't know of which I speak.
Seeing the pontoon out there to try and get a complete games makes me angry
Well
POSTGAME
What did we learn? Boof's black magic of succumbing to the big inning seems to be rubbing off on the other starters. The occasional gopherball is OK, but not when there are people on base. But I have a feeling they'll bounce back and beat Padilla (not the terrorist) tomorrow.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
What is a Quality Start?
PREGAME
As you know, I watch Jeopardy! a lot. Maybe you didn't know that. I always think "Oh I could so do that" between handfuls of Trader Joe's dried apricots (at least in this one instance), but then I don't take into account the fact that it's harder than it looks. You have to buzz in right and you're on stage and there's like, real money at stake, so maybe just confidently blurting out the answers isn't gonna actually get you anything? Unless you're Rosario Dawson in White Men Can't Jump.
Oh yeah, anyway, after a long game with many pitchers last night (Bon Jovi as a PH?) we could really use a quality start tonight.
Anyway, let's watch some baseball.
TOP 1ST
Oooh! Lobster on Good Eats!
All we need is a pitcher named Embers, Cracker Barrel and Waffle House, and we'd have the roadside diner thing pretty much covered. Call up Dan Ponderosa!
And he'll be squaring off against Johnny Mathis. It's not for me to saaaaay
Haha, at first I thought the Treasure Island scouting report that said Ponderosa has shown "poise" on the mound, and at first I saw "pois" which sounds delicious. I like what I'm seeing!
BOTTOM 1ST
Ooh, rolling out a lobster leg with a rolling pin gets the meat out. I had a pet lobster once for a few weeks. Then we ate it. My roommate and I were horrible people at the S-J-U.
Triples, speed on the basepaths, Baltimore Chops and run production? Is this 2001 with Guzman and Rivas?
Oh dear, I'm already giddy. If Dr Neau hits a dinger here, it'd be shades of 2006.
Yeah, the Walker: Texas Rangers respect the Kubel
TOP 2, TXR 0 MNT 2
Hm, I feel that whenever Candyland Chutes and Ladders hits against us he always gets on base.
I like that I don't get a chance to say a lot when the Twins are pitching.
Bonus Good Eats! Scallops! Yum.
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
Sorry, but a guacamole dinner called.
Also, tonight's beer: Frugal Joe's Ordinary Beer. Clever packaging won me over. Brewed in lovely New Ulm Minnesota!
Singles, walks, patience at the plate; I like. But I'm not gonna say this is the beginning of a new page - this is Johnny Mathis' first start, after all.
Feel-ding skillz, Kinsler haz them.
I like the fact that I'm not seeing Gomez swing at pitches low and away so much.
Well, rock and roll. Knocked the starter out.
Ha, true, Laurel. I know Bon Jovi, as far as pitchers go, is one of the better ones, but still, that's not something you expect to see. Were you in an all you can eat seat?
How many times has Salamander been to the mound now?
The Twins are on pace for 27 runs
TOP 4, RANGERS NOT A LOT TWINS A WHOLE LOT MORE
Hey, thanks for proving me wrong about always being on base, Sorry! Aggravation
This Glen Perkins guy, he's the new square real fair deal.
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
Cuddy wuz robbed!
Let's hope this is one of those games where they take an inning off from scoring. Still on pace to score 22.5 runs
TOP 5TH, SAME
Glen Ponderosa has a sort of erotic tongue lick before he throws the ball.
BOTTOM 5TH
Baseball!
TOP 6TH
Glen Ponderosa is Cruisin USA... or is it World? Or does anybody even know what I'm talking about anymore?
BOTTOM 6TH
Oh fuck nuggets. It's just not a Twins game unless there's a GIDP or 7
TOP 7TH
Boggle Guess Who is up. I'm the king of Boggle, there is none higher. I get 11 points on the word "quagmire."
It'd be great if Salamander could hit a ground ball at one of the infielders. That would be just superfantastiche.
Well... at least Sars is looking pretty effective here
BOTTOM 7TH
TRUE FACT: Kubel is good at the game of baseball
How many 3B is that for Young? Oh, 4. Thanks Bert.
TOP 8TH
Doobie, doobie doo
BOTTOM 8TH
I'm at the point where I want the game to just be over. I'm such a terrible fan. But I wouldn't if I were at the Metrodome. I'm getting nostalgic for Minnesota. Le sigh.
TOP 9TH
Hey, my mom called! Have a good night!
POSTGAME
Seriously, when Mom calls, I talk
As you know, I watch Jeopardy! a lot. Maybe you didn't know that. I always think "Oh I could so do that" between handfuls of Trader Joe's dried apricots (at least in this one instance), but then I don't take into account the fact that it's harder than it looks. You have to buzz in right and you're on stage and there's like, real money at stake, so maybe just confidently blurting out the answers isn't gonna actually get you anything? Unless you're Rosario Dawson in White Men Can't Jump.
Oh yeah, anyway, after a long game with many pitchers last night (Bon Jovi as a PH?) we could really use a quality start tonight.
Anyway, let's watch some baseball.
TOP 1ST
Oooh! Lobster on Good Eats!
All we need is a pitcher named Embers, Cracker Barrel and Waffle House, and we'd have the roadside diner thing pretty much covered. Call up Dan Ponderosa!
And he'll be squaring off against Johnny Mathis. It's not for me to saaaaay
Haha, at first I thought the Treasure Island scouting report that said Ponderosa has shown "poise" on the mound, and at first I saw "pois" which sounds delicious. I like what I'm seeing!
BOTTOM 1ST
Ooh, rolling out a lobster leg with a rolling pin gets the meat out. I had a pet lobster once for a few weeks. Then we ate it. My roommate and I were horrible people at the S-J-U.
Triples, speed on the basepaths, Baltimore Chops and run production? Is this 2001 with Guzman and Rivas?
Oh dear, I'm already giddy. If Dr Neau hits a dinger here, it'd be shades of 2006.
Yeah, the Walker: Texas Rangers respect the Kubel
TOP 2, TXR 0 MNT 2
Hm, I feel that whenever Candyland Chutes and Ladders hits against us he always gets on base.
I like that I don't get a chance to say a lot when the Twins are pitching.
Bonus Good Eats! Scallops! Yum.
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
Sorry, but a guacamole dinner called.
Also, tonight's beer: Frugal Joe's Ordinary Beer. Clever packaging won me over. Brewed in lovely New Ulm Minnesota!
Singles, walks, patience at the plate; I like. But I'm not gonna say this is the beginning of a new page - this is Johnny Mathis' first start, after all.
Feel-ding skillz, Kinsler haz them.
I like the fact that I'm not seeing Gomez swing at pitches low and away so much.
Well, rock and roll. Knocked the starter out.
Ha, true, Laurel. I know Bon Jovi, as far as pitchers go, is one of the better ones, but still, that's not something you expect to see. Were you in an all you can eat seat?
How many times has Salamander been to the mound now?
The Twins are on pace for 27 runs
TOP 4, RANGERS NOT A LOT TWINS A WHOLE LOT MORE
Hey, thanks for proving me wrong about always being on base, Sorry! Aggravation
This Glen Perkins guy, he's the new square real fair deal.
BOTTOM 4TH, SAME
Cuddy wuz robbed!
Let's hope this is one of those games where they take an inning off from scoring. Still on pace to score 22.5 runs
TOP 5TH, SAME
Glen Ponderosa has a sort of erotic tongue lick before he throws the ball.
BOTTOM 5TH
Baseball!
TOP 6TH
Glen Ponderosa is Cruisin USA... or is it World? Or does anybody even know what I'm talking about anymore?
BOTTOM 6TH
Oh fuck nuggets. It's just not a Twins game unless there's a GIDP or 7
TOP 7TH
Boggle Guess Who is up. I'm the king of Boggle, there is none higher. I get 11 points on the word "quagmire."
It'd be great if Salamander could hit a ground ball at one of the infielders. That would be just superfantastiche.
Well... at least Sars is looking pretty effective here
BOTTOM 7TH
TRUE FACT: Kubel is good at the game of baseball
How many 3B is that for Young? Oh, 4. Thanks Bert.
TOP 8TH
Doobie, doobie doo
BOTTOM 8TH
I'm at the point where I want the game to just be over. I'm such a terrible fan. But I wouldn't if I were at the Metrodome. I'm getting nostalgic for Minnesota. Le sigh.
TOP 9TH
Hey, my mom called! Have a good night!
POSTGAME
Seriously, when Mom calls, I talk
Monday, May 19, 2008
Robo-Boogie
TOP 4TH
What's going on, party people? I see the Nachos Rancheros are up 2 to 1, and because BOOOOOOOOF is pitching, I assume that means all of those runs are from gopherballs.
Then I see him throw a 4-pitch inning. That's pretty good.
Hey, I like robots, do you like robots? I'll post videos with robots in them periodically, yeah?
BOTTOM 4TH, RACHEROS 2, GEMINI 1
It's a good thing, being a disappointment in other peoples' lives and them disappointing me, that the Rubik's Kubel comes through with a knock when he needs to. Of course, he didn't go to SOUVENIR CITY! But perhaps later
Speaking of Souvenir City, I have to say that BBTN is more enjoyable lately, the guys seem to have more fun, and crack wise at each other. Crack wise. I'm 80 and your grandpa. Could it be the noticeable absence of Karl
People who live in the MPS, is there a building sentiment against Joe Vavra? I don't know the pulse, but yeah, the bats, they are silent
I'm about to curse.
Double-fuck you, mlb.tv. Your player is straight bollocks. I miss Casilla's home run because of you? How often is that going to happen? About as often as Jason Renyt Tyner, I bet.
Alright, chill heem, just be happy the good guys are up 4-2 now.
TOP 5TH, TEX-MEX 2 TWINS 4
I'm forced to watch the crappy stream from mlb.com, so that's awesome. This is why I pay for premium!
Frank Catalanatto is from Long Island. I remember Michael Kay irritatingly saying that when he was with the BJs.
Kubel is also with leather! Salta- Slama- Salamander's fly ball died in the wind. Kidding! There's no wind! But wait till there is and there's no roof and everybody's fingers freeze and then the Discovery Channel has to do a special where Survivorman eats an anteater atop the baggie. Don't let that happen.
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
People keep emailing me asking for a link exchange. Hey blogpeople, why does this happen? How does soccerfan.balls.net find out about this blog and think there should be a link exchange? They probably make money doing this. To me, a link exchange is changing armor in Zelda games.
Anyway, in re: the baseball game - fuck buttons.
TOP 6TH
Fuck Buttons is actually the name of a... band. We'll say a... difficult band. OK, a noise band. Here, if you dare:
Bonser's looking a-pretty-pretty good, not gonna lie. Some good fielding behind him though. Notice I didn't call it defense. Because I'm a purist! Blah blah Buzz Bissinger computers are taking us over!
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
Congratulations to Mr. Jon Lester. A no-hitter's nothing to sneeze at, and I always root for cancer survivors. For my next controversial statement of the night: kittens are cute.
Also congratulations to Mr. Dlmon Yung, on his first triple of the season. You're getting closer to why the Twins picked you up! Keep trying!
TOP 7TH, DON'T MESS WITH 2 LAND OF 10K LAKES 5
Bert waxes philosophical about the transient nature of positions, starts, at bats, and Ray-moan Ortiz. He's like a modern day Schopenhauer. Except clearly not as depressed.
I heard Brendan Boggs drank 60 beers on a cross-country flight!
"You want to get into the 7th, 8th, 9th inning." True, Bert, but do you know what inning Jack Morris wants? The 10th, baby!
Franis Giacomo Catalanotto almost made me have some anger salad, but it barely went foul. I assume Giacomo is his middle name.
Booooooooooooooof!!
Now I understand why people drink Listerine.
But I believe in Guerrierrierrierrierrierrierr
You know how I like to talk about things other than baseball during tense moments, right? Did you also know I sometimes read books? It's true! If you'd like a recommendation for your summer novel, check out anything by Edward Abbey, but especially The Monkey Wrench Gang, especially if you're into ecological sabotage. And maybe you are, but don't tell me or anybody else!
I get the impression that when they go to Coomer it's the realization by Dick that they haven't talked to him in 3 innings. It's like that friend, you know the one, that you always forget to invite out. It's not that you don't like that friend, they just always slipped your mind. That's Coomer.
Guerrierr comes through! Of course he does!
BOTTOM 7TH, TAXES 4, WIN ST. 5
Hey, it's Everyday Eddie Guardado! Or as Jon Miller would say in the playoffs, Guadardo.
Oh, Twingo. Hubert H. Humphrey Metrodome, I miss you. I feel so far away in the Commonwealth of Virginia
Nibbish, you're right about Young, don't get me wrong, I don't mind the high average, but we're loooking for a bit of power here, right?
TOP 8TH, SAME
I would be on my 8th nachos right now.
And beginning to look like Mexican Independence Day, but perhaps a little less jowl-y. I mean seriously.
That's the first time I've heard Reyes' voice, and it's awesome.
I feel Brandonsmash coming on. I'll explain that later when it subsides, but I'll say it has something to do with my friend BK
Well, I suppose the timing is about right, because I have to take off for a cocktail with some friends before they leave the country tomorrow. This does not bode well.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Back From The Grave
PREGAME
Well I'm done. It's submitted approved, electronically stored, and you can't see it for 3 years! Whee! Not that anybody's looking but... y'know.
And I've been partying here, DC, and everywhere in between. Yep, including Ironto, Roanoke, Salem, Buena Vista, Lexington, Staunton, Harrisonburg, Front Royal and not really I'm kidding.
So what's going on here? Roy Halladay huh? Should be awesome.
TOP 1ST
RK: I just want to start this game by noting that even I was kind of surprised at myself when I downloaded a best of Level 42 album
WV: Nice, I like your game. Boof vs. Halladay, I like these odds.
RK: Odds of a 4-inning start?
WV: Those odds have to be pretty good, and that means we'll have an endemic Sars plague later on.
RK: Remember when people took SARS seriously in the late '90s?
WV: Ah yes, the days off $2 gas.
RK: Que the hell? Why is Casilla playing short? He can't play second!
WV: Sand Castle just toppled... How about a 2 inning start?
RK: It's what the starters have been doing lately, get all the runs out during the first
WV: The ghost of Brad Radke haunts us all. Me, I've picked up an urge to go fishing.
RK: I wonder what Eric Milton is up to
WV: My hamstring suddenly hurts.
RK: Big K for Boof
WV: Having watched Rios watch a third strike down the middle of the plate, Casilla mistakenly believes he's reverted to the Lacanian mirror stage.
RK: They can't touch each other or they'd breach the parallax gap
WV: What do you think of this?: http://www.startribune.com/sports/twins/18934699.html?location_refer=Homepage
RK: I have much love for Renyt, but really, you hit one home run and that's earning your stripes?
WV: I'd like to think that my not so savory ex-girlfriends think the same thing about me.
RK: You have got to be kidding me
WV: Well then.
RK: I'm about ready to jump off the Boof wagon
WV: Between Kubel and Boof, I'm going to jump off somebody's wagon pretty quick here.
RK: I'll remain loyal to the Rubik's Kubel
BOTTOM 1ST
RK: I have to quibble with the Treasure Island scouting report on Mr. Halladay. They claim the Twins have never beaten him, but I could have sworn that Mr. Santana did just that in early 2003. Perhaps Halladay didn't take the loss
WV: Perhaps not. But I like Toblerone's spirit
RK: His tough toffee center shows through
WV: Justin the nick of time! Pull Boof before it's too late!
RK: Good Lord, now THAT's a Baltimore Chop if Cuddy can get to first on it...
Who doubts the Rubik's Kubel? WHO?!
WV: On the list of things I didn't expect to happen....
RK: He's trying to out-Boof Boof
WV: All of this offense has me a bit flushed.
RK: Final score on current track: 36-27
TOP 2ND, BJs 4 TC 3
WV: Boof will be fine for 4 or 5 innings and then everyone will sing his praises for battling back.
RK: Setting the bar low? It's the Hillary Rodham Clinton-slash-RK method of everyday life
WV: You're a better public speaker though, don't set the bar THAT low.
RK: I've given guest lectures at real universities! And not just for hard-working *white* people!
WV: As if Virginia needed yet another reason to disapprove of their Western brethren.
RK: But seriously, I hope WVa paves their roads soon
BOTTOM 2ND, SAME
RK: Telly! How I've missed you! Thanks Stacey, though I've already signed up for classes next year, so it's kind of a weird "graduation."
WV: I would put 3 K's in a row to signal that the side struck out but uh...
TOP 3RD, SAME
RK: Young made that look harder than it was. Stacey, that was the plan, just not here. But the offer I got at Tech was the same monetary amount as a school in New York City, so that became an easy choice.
WV: If Twins starters could just mulligan the first innings, they'd be the best staff in the league
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
RK: Music suggestion - We Are Scientists; "Brain Thrust Mastery"
WV: This is baseball. Can't be throwing the ball around the field, Toronto.
RK: What do you call someone from Toronto? I vote for "Torontula"
WV: Torontella?
RK: Aaaand we're tied
RK: Jack Morris and Bert are waxing eternal about pitchers completing games
WV: See old Jack didn't just complete games, he went 12 innings, bitch. That line drive is a microcosm of Kubel's career thus far.
RK: He had a good rip earlier in the game, I stay committed
TOP 4TH, TIED AT 4
WV: So Halladay has a lower ERA than Livan but he's 3 and 5. Chew on that.
RK: Just goes to show you how meaningless W-L is for a pitcher's worth
WV: Right
RK: Challah day is probably a better pitcher, but what can you do?
WV: Lamb has got the "I'm really slow so I have to dive a lot but that tricks Dick into thinking I'm a good fielder" thing going on.
RK: 3B is an awfully reactive position anyway, so he can cheat a bit
WV: Remember when our whole pitching staff didn't walk people?
RK: That was awesome
WV: Let's see if Boof can hit 100 pitches by the end of this inning.
RK: Welp
WV: Maybe Boof is the answer to our bullpen problems.
RK: He'd be a good long man. Stacey, I generally don't think much of facial hair on anybody - it rarely works. I feel like with a name like Verlander, if you can't grow a huge Van Dyke, don't bother
WV: This game is giving me a headache
BOTTOM 4TH, JAYS 5 TWINS 4
RK: Dlmon Young should have just been grateful for the bloop single
WV: Ugly
TOP 5TH, SAME
RK: Uh... Another 80s video then?
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
This game is definitely warping space across time
TOP 6TH, SAME
You tell us something interesting, hm?
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
RK: We appreciate Madness too, Stacey, as fans of ska, we like to occasionally go back to some of the 3rd wave origins
WV: I was always more of a Specials man myself, but Madness has their moments.
RK: But going even farther back, I still put my iPod to the Skatelites
WV: Gosh, I wish we woulda gone after Scott Rolen.
RK: 6 of Lamb, half a dozen of Rolen
TOP 7TH, SAME
RK: It's a Joowan appearance!
WV: Nice recovery by the small sandcastle
BOTTOM 7TH
WV: Now if we could just get him and Go[m]ez on base at the same time.
RK: It'd be like Guzman and Rivas of old
WV: Mother---
RK: I'm having a hard time paying attention. I'm getting a dog in a few months and I'm looking at breeds
WV: Really? What are you leaning towards?
RK: I think a pug is on top, but the bulldog not far behind
TOP 8TH
RK: After that throw, I'm going on blogstrike
WV: I'll join you, mostly because I have to go to the airport.
RK and/or WV: Tut tut, Twins. Tut tut.
Well I'm done. It's submitted approved, electronically stored, and you can't see it for 3 years! Whee! Not that anybody's looking but... y'know.
And I've been partying here, DC, and everywhere in between. Yep, including Ironto, Roanoke, Salem, Buena Vista, Lexington, Staunton, Harrisonburg, Front Royal and not really I'm kidding.
So what's going on here? Roy Halladay huh? Should be awesome.
TOP 1ST
RK: I just want to start this game by noting that even I was kind of surprised at myself when I downloaded a best of Level 42 album
WV: Nice, I like your game. Boof vs. Halladay, I like these odds.
RK: Odds of a 4-inning start?
WV: Those odds have to be pretty good, and that means we'll have an endemic Sars plague later on.
RK: Remember when people took SARS seriously in the late '90s?
WV: Ah yes, the days off $2 gas.
RK: Que the hell? Why is Casilla playing short? He can't play second!
WV: Sand Castle just toppled... How about a 2 inning start?
RK: It's what the starters have been doing lately, get all the runs out during the first
WV: The ghost of Brad Radke haunts us all. Me, I've picked up an urge to go fishing.
RK: I wonder what Eric Milton is up to
WV: My hamstring suddenly hurts.
RK: Big K for Boof
WV: Having watched Rios watch a third strike down the middle of the plate, Casilla mistakenly believes he's reverted to the Lacanian mirror stage.
RK: They can't touch each other or they'd breach the parallax gap
WV: What do you think of this?: http://www.startribune.com/sports/twins/18934699.html?location_refer=Homepage
RK: I have much love for Renyt, but really, you hit one home run and that's earning your stripes?
WV: I'd like to think that my not so savory ex-girlfriends think the same thing about me.
RK: You have got to be kidding me
WV: Well then.
RK: I'm about ready to jump off the Boof wagon
WV: Between Kubel and Boof, I'm going to jump off somebody's wagon pretty quick here.
RK: I'll remain loyal to the Rubik's Kubel
BOTTOM 1ST
RK: I have to quibble with the Treasure Island scouting report on Mr. Halladay. They claim the Twins have never beaten him, but I could have sworn that Mr. Santana did just that in early 2003. Perhaps Halladay didn't take the loss
WV: Perhaps not. But I like Toblerone's spirit
RK: His tough toffee center shows through
WV: Justin the nick of time! Pull Boof before it's too late!
RK: Good Lord, now THAT's a Baltimore Chop if Cuddy can get to first on it...
Who doubts the Rubik's Kubel? WHO?!
WV: On the list of things I didn't expect to happen....
RK: He's trying to out-Boof Boof
WV: All of this offense has me a bit flushed.
RK: Final score on current track: 36-27
TOP 2ND, BJs 4 TC 3
WV: Boof will be fine for 4 or 5 innings and then everyone will sing his praises for battling back.
RK: Setting the bar low? It's the Hillary Rodham Clinton-slash-RK method of everyday life
WV: You're a better public speaker though, don't set the bar THAT low.
RK: I've given guest lectures at real universities! And not just for hard-working *white* people!
WV: As if Virginia needed yet another reason to disapprove of their Western brethren.
RK: But seriously, I hope WVa paves their roads soon
BOTTOM 2ND, SAME
RK: Telly! How I've missed you! Thanks Stacey, though I've already signed up for classes next year, so it's kind of a weird "graduation."
WV: I would put 3 K's in a row to signal that the side struck out but uh...
TOP 3RD, SAME
RK: Young made that look harder than it was. Stacey, that was the plan, just not here. But the offer I got at Tech was the same monetary amount as a school in New York City, so that became an easy choice.
WV: If Twins starters could just mulligan the first innings, they'd be the best staff in the league
BOTTOM 3RD, SAME
RK: Music suggestion - We Are Scientists; "Brain Thrust Mastery"
WV: This is baseball. Can't be throwing the ball around the field, Toronto.
RK: What do you call someone from Toronto? I vote for "Torontula"
WV: Torontella?
RK: Aaaand we're tied
RK: Jack Morris and Bert are waxing eternal about pitchers completing games
WV: See old Jack didn't just complete games, he went 12 innings, bitch. That line drive is a microcosm of Kubel's career thus far.
RK: He had a good rip earlier in the game, I stay committed
TOP 4TH, TIED AT 4
WV: So Halladay has a lower ERA than Livan but he's 3 and 5. Chew on that.
RK: Just goes to show you how meaningless W-L is for a pitcher's worth
WV: Right
RK: Challah day is probably a better pitcher, but what can you do?
WV: Lamb has got the "I'm really slow so I have to dive a lot but that tricks Dick into thinking I'm a good fielder" thing going on.
RK: 3B is an awfully reactive position anyway, so he can cheat a bit
WV: Remember when our whole pitching staff didn't walk people?
RK: That was awesome
WV: Let's see if Boof can hit 100 pitches by the end of this inning.
RK: Welp
WV: Maybe Boof is the answer to our bullpen problems.
RK: He'd be a good long man. Stacey, I generally don't think much of facial hair on anybody - it rarely works. I feel like with a name like Verlander, if you can't grow a huge Van Dyke, don't bother
WV: This game is giving me a headache
BOTTOM 4TH, JAYS 5 TWINS 4
RK: Dlmon Young should have just been grateful for the bloop single
WV: Ugly
TOP 5TH, SAME
RK: Uh... Another 80s video then?
BOTTOM 5TH, SAME
This game is definitely warping space across time
TOP 6TH, SAME
You tell us something interesting, hm?
BOTTOM 6TH, SAME
RK: We appreciate Madness too, Stacey, as fans of ska, we like to occasionally go back to some of the 3rd wave origins
WV: I was always more of a Specials man myself, but Madness has their moments.
RK: But going even farther back, I still put my iPod to the Skatelites
WV: Gosh, I wish we woulda gone after Scott Rolen.
RK: 6 of Lamb, half a dozen of Rolen
TOP 7TH, SAME
RK: It's a Joowan appearance!
WV: Nice recovery by the small sandcastle
BOTTOM 7TH
WV: Now if we could just get him and Go[m]ez on base at the same time.
RK: It'd be like Guzman and Rivas of old
WV: Mother---
RK: I'm having a hard time paying attention. I'm getting a dog in a few months and I'm looking at breeds
WV: Really? What are you leaning towards?
RK: I think a pug is on top, but the bulldog not far behind
TOP 8TH
RK: After that throw, I'm going on blogstrike
WV: I'll join you, mostly because I have to go to the airport.
RK and/or WV: Tut tut, Twins. Tut tut.
Tuesday, May 06, 2008
The Dirty Truth
I'm not abandoning you guys, I promise. But let me tell you the insidious nature of this self-flagellation some people call "graduate school."
- As you know, I've defended my thesis. That doesn't mean it's "done," and in fact I'm making revisions
- When I submit it to the grad school for publication (which you can't see for 3 years! Nobody's taking my research!) I have two weeks to make edits and changes THEY think I need doing.
Getting it defended? That's only the start. But it seems our boys are winning when we don't blog, so what does that say? Nothing, it's a coincidence, and correlation doesn't prove cause!
- As you know, I've defended my thesis. That doesn't mean it's "done," and in fact I'm making revisions
- When I submit it to the grad school for publication (which you can't see for 3 years! Nobody's taking my research!) I have two weeks to make edits and changes THEY think I need doing.
Getting it defended? That's only the start. But it seems our boys are winning when we don't blog, so what does that say? Nothing, it's a coincidence, and correlation doesn't prove cause!
Friday, May 02, 2008
I Don't Know Much
And neither does Aaron Neville. But whatever. As WV alluded to earlier, I did successfully defend my thesis on Wednesday and have been non-stop with the family wholesome partying since then. These defense panels are no joke! So no game for me tonight, kiddos, I've got beer pong on patios to think about
--RK
--RK
